Andy Reid: the 7 best GIFs and videos of the Chiefs head coach

4. No Treble

Full disclosure: I don’t like when the Denver Broncos beat the Chiefs. At this point, it’s just another (tear)drop in the bucket, but Peyton Manning’s jingles are hate crimes against the hearing public, and I’m still convinced John Elway owns hooves.

Due to their following, losing to the Oakland Raiders is even worse. Anytime you’re dealing with middle-aged Papa Shangos, logic tends to fly out the window. That being the case, the Black Hole howls about every win with a “We’re back, baby!” enthusiasm, despite the fact that their only season-ticket holder is a tarp.

With those losses, the pain subsides in an hour or so. But losing to Philip Rivers? Different story.

The yelling, the pouting, the T-Rex throwing motion; everything about Rivers is annoying. After one beer, there’s no doubt in my mind that he answers everything in some kind of Southern riddle. Man, you sweatin’ too? “Like a mongoose in a briar patch.”

Needless to say, when Reid ended one of Rivers’ tantrums via bump-and-grind special, he gained my everlasting loyalty.