So here I was, all ready to dissect the shocking, fifth-round-fortune-shaping impact of the recent Kansas City Chiefs-Detroit Lions tampering scandal, when I realized: hey, it’s Oscar Week. And three weeks after the Super Bowl and seven weeks after the Chiefs’ last game,* it’s at least a mild comfort to once again have an over-hyped contest to watch on TV come Sunday, perfect for side bets and drinking games.
*It was an honor just being nominated. Oh, bullshit.
But I can understand if red-carpet cocktails and Oscar pools aren’t exactly any kind of substitute for pre-game tailgating and fantasy team-tracking. So in an attempt to bridge the divide, I went ahead and devised this quick quiz for your amusement.*
*What, you’d rather read more about the CBA?
Can you name the 10 Academy Award nominees for Best Picture, based on their NFL Films remakes? (Answers below.)
1. An epic, tragic tale that unfolds over the course of the Kansas City Chiefs’ 2007-2009 seasons, this film recounts the pain of nearly 40 games’ worth of winless football (enough to lead even the most diehard fan to consider chewing off his own arm).
2. A feel-good feature about the scrappy Chiefs draft class of 2010. Starring Eric Berry, Tony Moeaki, and Kendrick Lewis, with Dexter McCluster in a small, supporting role.
3. Raiders owner Al Davis’s life story is finally brought to the big screen in this grotesque reinterpretation of “The Ugly Duckling.”
4. From 4-12 to 10-6… The best rushing team in the league… The playoffs… Hope for the future. Or was it all just a dream?
5. In this classic AFC Western, a team that was all but left for dead regroups behind a gruff, goateed stranger from Arizona and hunts down its rivals, one by one.
6. Against the backdrop of the freewheeling 1960s, a proud Texas oilman and founder of an upstart football league challenges the big, bad NFL to a season-ending showdown—but what should the game be called? And then, one day, while watching his children play with a “Super Ball,” the name comes to him.
7. Forced by fate and Carl Peterson to assume a leadership role for which he simply was not prepared, Coach Herm Edwards must inspire his unsure team through one of the darkest periods in its history—but no one can understand a damn word he says.
8. An obnoxious, socially awkward kid in a hoodie steals a plan from some athletes and suddenly Facebook and Twitter explode: There’s a lot of #$% being talked about Josh McDaniels.
9. The Chiefs may have stopped fighting on the field, but in the wake of the team’s heartrending playoff loss to the Baltimore Ravens, one man—determined, stupid, and likely drunk—battled on. See the trailer here.
10. It’s a soul-chilling day at Arrowhead, and Shaun Smith is on a singular mission—and the line of scrimmage isn’t the only line he plans on crossing.
(Answers: 1. 127 Hours; 2. The Kids Are All Right; 3. Black Swan; 4. Inception; 5. True Grit; 6. Toy Story 3; 7. The King’s Speech; 8. The Social Network; 9. The Fighter; 10. Winter’s Bone)