Randy On The Road! Don’t Tell Me I’ve Nothing To Do!


I was looking at my calendar this morning, I’ve plans to attend twelve Chiefs games this year. Thats the most I’ve ever tried.

I’ve been going to Chiefs games a long time, and if there is one thing I learned from the experience,  it’s that one of my companions will cancel.

When they do, no biggser. You won’t tell me I’ve nothing to do.

If its the upcoming preseason game next week,  and you drive highway 71 north, you will likely see a Dodge 4×4 Hemi, with Chiefs flags a flyin’, on its way to Arrowhead, piloted by a jersey wearing, backwards hat sporting,  Arrowhead Addict.  If you pass me I’ll smile and shoot “buddy bullets” from my pistol shaped hand.

A common sight on a Sunday morning perhaps, a little stranger at 2pm on a Friday afternoon. Oh well that’s how I roll.

I’ll stop at the Osceola Cheese store on the way. With hamster like cheeks filled with cheese samples, I’ll approach the counter with my 98 cent 20 oz bottled water, the exact size allowed past the gate in the greatest NFL stadium in the world. “Keep the change,”  I’ll wink as I head out the door.

There won’t be any grilling or tailgating for me today, as I enter the gates of Arrowhead and flash my red parking pass,  my survival today will depend on the kindness of strangers…..

I’ll wander down the aisles stopping at the set up that smells the best, then tell the chef how great it looks, accept his invitation to sit a spell, and carelessly munch on a plate of hot wings as the clouds float aimlessly by.

I’ll wander around some more, if there is a can on the ground I might kick it, if a hat blows off someone’s head I might wear it, if a ball rolls in front of me I might toss it.

I’ll walk by someones stereo set up and change my stride to incorporate the beat, then flash a go Chiefs victory sign to the DJ.

If I see a baby, I’ll give it a high five. Babies never leave you hangin’.

If an Eagles fan glares at me, I’ll glare back. I might also do that thing where I say “wait something is in my pocket”, then pull out my hand with the middle finger extended. I might act like I’m ready to fight if a cop is close enough by.

An eight year old runny nosed young man  might show me a dead bird he found, I’ll say “yeah that’s pretty cool kid”.

A lonely ticket might twist and turn in the wind, I’ll chase it down and see if its better than mine. If not I’ll give it  someone else, scalpers won’t give you crap for your tickets anymore.

If a a cop is standing watch by the concession stand I might stop and ask him if he likes this gig. He might answer with an enthusiastic yes, and he might give me a “whatever” glance.

When I find me new seats, I’ll evaluate my new neighbors and introduce myself. Soon that warm feeling of belonging will sweep over me, just like in high school when you walk around with your tray of food, hit the condiment bar three times more than necessary, then spot your friends waving for you to join them for the rest of the lunch period.

I’ll try and get on the jumbotron every time the guy walks buy with the boom mike and camera, I’ll have a pretty good chance from my seats in the second row.

The guy next too me will want to talk Chiefs with me most of the game, and that’s fine with me, it’s always fun to find a fresh face to debate the 2010 season with someone who knows their stuff.

I’ll introduce someone to “peanut poker”.  Each of us will toss a peanut shell on the aisle steps and put a dollar in the “pot”. We will breathlessly wait to see whose shell is stepped on , occasionally asking the pretty blonde lady across the aisle to arbitrate.

I’ll probably leave late in the third quarter, I’ll have a long drive home, plus its fun to listen to the game on the radio after being there.  I’ll  send texts as I lay in bed that night, letting everyone know I made it home ok, and to read my post on AA the following day.

Yeah, I’m looking forward to a great 2010 season, attending games with people I see every day, as well as people I see once a year, or once every five. And I’ll have a great time.

But if they cancel, I’m no loser, I’ll have a great time. You won’t tell me I’ve nothing to do!!!!!