OMG! And You Thought Levi Jones Got His Ass Whooped in Sin City


That scared sh**less look you see on Carson Palmer‘s face, yeah, that was there all day long. Why? Because Jared Allen was also there all day long. Big No. 69 — or Space Cowboy, according to one Jason Whitlock… I call him OMG, for One Man Gang, but also because he makes you say “Oh my God” at least two or three times a game — had 2.5 sacks in the first half, wreaking so much havoc that Bengals head coach Marvin Lewis had to actually bench starting left tackle Levi Jones. Lewis had no other choice. It looked like Osi Umenyiora-Winston Justice II at that point.

And you thought homeboy got his ass whooped by Joey Porter and Co. in Vegas (hat tip to Ballsiest).

Here’s what people are saying about Allen’s beatdown of Jones:

"“Jared Allen ran around Levi Jones for 2.5 sacks. Jones looked like the worst offensive tackle in team history after being one of the best in recent years.” – Adam Kiefaber, Bengal Stripes“That was 2 1/2 sacks in less than 10 minutes. It was like watching a high school kid play pee-wee football” – Joe Posnanski, The Kansas City Star“It is amazing how far this once-stellar offensive lineman has fallen. It is one thing to be outplayed by a defensive lineman, but to stand there like you are wearing cement cleats while your quarterback gets crushed is pathetic. Apparently, Marvin Lewis agreed, because he yanked Lewis in the first quarter and, quite frankly, may never let the spoiled Jones on the field in a Bengals uniform again.” – Greg Stephens, Bengals Zone“Just a bit more on Jared Allen. He forced a fumble and had 2.5 sacks. He was within an arm’s length of Carson Palmer innumerable times. Like Tony Gonzalez said to the media after the game, “If Jared Allen doesn’t go to the Pro Bowl, its your fault.” This guy is better than Neil Smith…” – Chris Thorman, Arrowhead Pride“DE Jared Allen is an absolute monster on the field. 2.5 sacks to go with a forced fumble today gives him 6 sacks on the season, which is incredible given his offseason tantrums last spring when the Chiefs wouldn’t extend his contract. I love his attitude, his intensity, and his ability to flat out dominate his opponents, plus he has turned out to be a excellent leader on this defense.” – Chris, K.C. Chiefs Fanatic"

The following is an excellent breakdown of each time OMG beat Jones, compliments of Josh Kirkendall, Cincy Jungle:

"“Jonsing for a Pass Blocker. I thought the story early was Levi Jones’ inability to block Chiefs defensive end Jared Allen. It set the tone early for the Chiefs defense and forced the Bengals pass offense to become quicker — limiting deep passes. Jones, after whining about playing time, was pulled after allowing his third sack in the first half. Jones has been saying all along that he’s healthy. He even invited his agent, by way of becoming publicly disgruntled, to claim that other teams would love to have Jones. Historically, Jones has blocked some of the best defensive ends in the league. So I reasonably conclude that Jones’ is in fact not healthy causing incredible limitations on his speed. If I’m wrong, then we’re spending way too much money on a guy that was virtually ineffective Sunday. But I’ll give him the benefit of the doubt… for now.“Sack Allowed by Jones #1. It was third-and-four at the Cincinnati 24-yard line with over five minutes left in the first quarter. With Palmer in shotgun and Kenny Watson blocking to his right, Jones went one-on-one against Allen. Snap. Massive — and easy — bull rush and sack.“Sack Allowed by Jones #2. Second-and-10 at the Cincinnati 17-yard line with seconds clicking off the first quarter. The Chiefs pressure Carson Palmer with seven rushers. Allen faked engagement causing Jones to lean forward at the waist. It was already over. Having lost his balance, Jones ate popcorn while Allen dropped Palmer for a seven-yard loss. There was a lot of pressure and chaos around Palmer — all except for Allen was picked up. If Allen was blocked, Palmer did have a lane to step up in to just get rid of the pass. But, you know. Hindsight. Perfect. Monday. Backseat Driver.“Sack Allowed by Jones #3. This play really illustrates just how slow Jones was against the quicker Allen. Allen took a sprinters stance and took off at the gun. Palmer dropped back and started to roll out right feeling pressure. Jones tried to push Allen out, but there was too much separation between the two and the push was ineffective. Rudi Johnson was in perfect position to help Jones. Instead, he ran a route through the LOS and flipped around just beyond. By that time, the fumbled ball was rolling on the ground and the next stop for the Bengals offense was the sidelines.”"

I don’t even know what else to write here, so I’ll sum it up like this — Jared, we love you, man. Please, please, re-up and stay home at Arrowhead. Without you it just wouldn’t be home any more. And I don’t think I’ve said that since Derrick Thomas passed either. You deserve that kind of praise, though, not to mention a trip to the Pro Bowl.