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December 15, 2013; Oakland, CA, USA; Kansas City Chiefs running back Jamaal Charles (25) celebrates after scoring a 71-yard touchdown during the third quarter against the Oakland Raiders at O.co Coliseum. Mandatory Credit: Kyle Terada-USA TODAY Sports

My (Twitter) Encounter With The Black Hole


It’s all fun and games until a Raiders fan gets their feelings hurt.

Yesterday I found myself – well, really the Arrowhead Addict account – inundated with tweets from angry Oakland Raiders fans who were severely insulted by a tweet I sent out earlier in the day. What they found offensive about the tweet, I do not know, but they were indeed upset about all 140 characters of my well-crafted tweet.

Maybe, dear readers, you can help me identify what may have caused the sudden flood of mentions from Raiders fans. The tweet in question:

Apparently this was a very NSFW tweet on my part, thus saith the Raideratti. So let me explain myself first and maybe you’ll understand why I would release such a tweet to the world.

It all began with a tweet from Chiefs backup running back Knile Davis which featured this splendid Instagram photo.

You’ll notice on Davis’ pool table/dresser/counter/shoe shelf/multipurpose table he has a t-shirt of one Bo Jackson, one of my favorite athletes. I stared at this picture and lusted over the shirt. I wanted it badly. (Note: I repented later, my soul is at peace.)

I tweeted about it from the AA account and then lusted some more.

Then it hit me with the force of Bo Jackson trucking Brian Bosworth: I just tweeted an Oakland Raiders shirt via the Arrowhead Addict twitter account.

I felt dirty.

I felt shame.

I felt [checks thesaurus] opprobrium. [Checks dictionary: "the disgrace or the reproach incurred by conduct considered outrageously shameful; infamy." Yeah that. Definitely that.]

I needed to quickly send a tweet from the Arrowhead Addict account that would balance the global ch’i and save the world. If not, we may all turn into San Diego Chargers. Deity forbid!

The result was “The Tweet.” And with it came a flood of tweet from many Raiders fans who should have been working but clearly were not. Let me share a few of my favorites.

Many tweets had some version of “No [insert Hall of Fame player here]” and these people clearly missed the point. See, I don’t like Tim Brown so I don’t consider him to be a good thing to come out of the Raiders organization. Why? Because he’s a Raider.

Marcus Allen? Now he’s a Chief. I like him. And Bo Jackson? He was a Kansas City Royal. Those are good people I can get behind, not Howie Long.

But then the tweets started getting weird.

Bill Romanowski? What?! Really??? When you think “Raiders Greatness” the fourth name that comes to mind is Bill Romanowski? C’mon, man! But this wasn’t the worst one.

Tim Brown? Hall of famer, okay. Howie Long? Hall of famer, okay. Napoleon Kaufman? Hall of fa— wait, NAPOLEON KAUFMAN?!

You know what the best part of the Napoleon Kaufman thing is, aside from the absurdity of mentioning a guy who had one 1,000 yard season and 17 career touchdowns in six seasons next to two hall of famers? The very, very, very best part?

Kaufman was born in Kansas City, Missouri.

There were more tweets. Oh, there were more tweets indeed. This is about the time I switched into Charlie Day mode.

 

http://i.imgur.com/abhsIB0.gif

 

http://media.tumblr.com/52b21477c634df7f76486bd0fb996cbc/tumblr_inline_mgf6ixe2pr1rt2432.gif

http://big.assets.huffingtonpost.com/1120charlie.gif

Who would have thought all of this over a Knile Davis Instagram of Nike gear?

It was great learning Oakland has 14 hall of famers (KC has 12, not zero as some may have assumed) and Tim Brown did, in fact, play for the Raiders. Learning Kaufman and Romanowski hold a high status within Raider lore was also an important thing I learned. The Black Hole was indeed everything I thought it would be and more, even if it was just the Twitter version.

I’ll let Mr. Day have the final word.

http://media.tumblr.com/bf962fb8ddf505a961ed5f6f8b63a247/tumblr_inline_mgf6hnZdEr1rt2432.gif

P.S. I encourage everyone to go read Just Blog Baby to keep yourself up to date on the goings on with the Oakland Raiders. It is always good to be well informed and Just Blog Baby will help you accomplish that goal. Chase Ruttig runs things over there and he’s a good sport (and also Canadian!). 

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  • Stacy D. Smith

    I stopped reading at “Raiders.” The only good thing to come out of Oakland was MC Hammer. Tell the Silver & Blech followers I said, “DEAL WITH IT!”

    • berttheclock

      Hammer owned some quality race horses trained by D Wayne Lucas. But, did you know how he was named “Hammer”? He was a bat boy from ’73 to ’80 with the A’s and Reggie Jackson coined the term Hammer for him as being similar to Hank Aaron.

      • Stacy D. Smith

        I did know that!

  • Really?

    All I can say is 1-3. Enjoy your one Championship lol

    • berttheclock

      We still Savor it, Sir! But, at least we are really trying to make it two, whereas, look at the myriad of problems left to Al’s son and Reggie to try to clean up.

      • Really?

        Trying to make it two? You are one season removed from what was it 2-14 record? The problem that were left have mostly been resolved, we are only waiting on the stadium issue to be resolved.

    • Cole Martin

      And how many times did the raiders beat the chiefs last year? You can paint a turd but it will always be a turd

  • berttheclock

    Interesting as I just perused the Fan Sided Oakland Raiders site to check on any comments to your twitter with Just Blog Baby and found the first thread is the one by Lyle Graverson about Johnny Football. The JBB thread concerns whether the Raiders will be able to dump Terrelle Pryor on anyone. Just love that term used, “athletic, but erratic”. Seems to fit so many so called “athletically gifted athletes”. The ones who keep getting pushed up by Pop Warner, Middle and Senior coaches and college coaches who are all afraid of losing them should they attempt to instill any techniques into them. Happens with basketball players a great deal.

  • Travis Forsyth

    The fact the raiders have 2 more super bowls than kc is the only thing raider fans can use in an argument. The last time oakland was even considered a winning team was 2002 and they wouldn’t even been as good as they were if it wasn’t for us! We gave them Rich Gannon.

    • berttheclock

      In some respects, we gave them Ethan Horton, as well. Remember Horton? He was the one the Chiefs took at 15 in the draft and left Jerry Rice to go to the Niners at 16. He was signed to a $1.5 M contract, then, found he could not run from a pro set. He was later cut, played strike ball, beefed up and signed on with the Raiders as a TE, made the Pro Bowl and caught passes against the Chiefs.

      • Jaime Olguin

        You didn’t give him to us, he was cut then we showed him how to be a better player, plus he wasn’t
        the best TE we had either, get over dud .look out cause hear we come,

        • berttheclock

          If you go back and attempt to read my post, you will find I said he had been cut. Why should I be over it? My only problem with the Horton affair is how the Chiefs staff misread him at NC, then, paid him a million five. It ended up being a wasted pick. But, I do understand the problems of any Raiders fan trying to comprehend anything he is trying to read. Sort of akin to the time, I was passing by Camp Pendleton and hearing a USMC DI yelling to his squard, “Walk, Chew gum, walk, chew gum” Yeah, many of those young Marines were having the same problem as any Raiders fan trying to obtain reading comprehension skills.

    • Jaime Olguin

      Hey dude Rich Gannon was with the Vikings before he signed with the Raiders, and only two bowls you make
      It sound so close, the last time I looked the qiefs won that game somewhere in the early 70′s right, four trips
      Later and what is it 12,13, years will be heading back to the big dance before you win your next one that’s
      If you qiefs can pull it off, (Win Lose or Tie Raiders Till we Die.).

  • Travis Forsyth

    Any way, I figure it isn’t worth arguing with raider fans.

  • berttheclock

    At least, there is, finally, some back and forth between the Raiderettes and the Chiefs. I remember the days of yore when the two teams were one of the top rivalries in the NFL. However, for the past few years, whenever, I would visit their sites at Bay Area papers, the dustups appeared to be between the Bolts-Raiders and the Broncos-Raiders, as the Chiefs fell from memory of most fans of the Raiders.

  • Justin R Groth

    A Canadian raider fan? Seems like a contradiction.

  • Roc

    Along with the unintelligent rambling, and poor grammar you must admit the Raiders fans do have pride. I look forward to watching the Chiefs beat them twice again next season