Source: yardbarker.com
This entry came in last night just before the deadline. It is a short, humorous article that gave us a chuckle and that we thought would add some color to go along with our other two winners. For the author’s own safety, I will not reveal his true identity until after you have read the piece. For now, call him “The Phantom Writer”.
At great risk to my own health I have written this article to expose a lie so prevalent that it will rock the very core of the A-A world.
By some strange unexplainable phenomenon readers at A-A have become confused and misguided about the direction of this team. Whether it be by big fancy words or some kind of tribal witch craft, Matt Cassel has been able to deceive every single one of A-A’s readers. His feigned bravado and apparent talent level are carefully concealed behind a mist of treachery and deception. He has woven a web of lie’s and corruption of which the poor innocent fans of the Kansas City Chiefs have never seen. Matt Cassel has only one desire in life, to cause chaos and unrest where ever he goes. He does not care of the cost, nor the emotion turmoil he causes. He is born from pure darkness and his reach knows no bounds.
Luckily for me, a vast distance protects me from his evil gaze and controlling eye. It is for this reason that I must preach for all the unspoken victims of his reign of terror. I must be the vessel that unveils his cloud of deception. I must be the one to face the waves of terror and persecution. I must rise above and alarm the world of this new dark beginning.
Certain facts have recently come to my attention that must be shared with the blinded A-A faithful.
It is only then that you will be able to see the truth.
A former player of KC’s, whose name will not be mentioned, recently shared with me some interesting information. He was told by Matt Cassel himself that if he were to injure Tom Brady in the opening game of the season he would be rewarded with untold treasures the likes of which he had never seen. Although “Said Player” completed the task, his conscience got the better of him. He knew that he had to come clean. Unfortunately, Cassel had already seduced Pioli, the new GM and “Said Player” was “released” before he could reveal his information to the media. Fearing for his life, “Said Player” was forced to hide away until he could find adequate protection from a new team.
This is not the only case of Mass Cassel’s devilish ways. Once I have guaranteed my own safety I will reveal more facts and reveal the truth.
From reader Tim C.
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Is that Australia Tim?
We have a reader in Australia?
Huh? I’m sure this is tongue-in-cheek humor. But even if it wasn’t….are we to be shocked that there is politics within the player ranks with so much money at stake for these guys? We all would probably be shocked at some of the evil plots to destroy the competition among NFL players. I’m glad that stuff doesn’t see the light of day. I could care less how Matt got here, as long as he performs on the field.
No Randy!! That is from Moron Tim. You know the guy that got upset because his man-crush for Pollard has blinded him to the greater good. Should we have gotten rid of Pollard, NO! He was a good player that we should have kept, but come on, GET OVER IT!!!! What are you, a two year old that keeps repeating I want, I want, I want!!??
Mike:
Take it easy. I believe the article is meant to be a joke. “Evil Matt Cassel” putting a hit on Tom Brady?
Come on.
This is obviously a joke but it does make you wonder. Remember those reports about players on the Raven’s defense having a “hit list” for each game. I wonder if they still do that?
I heard that matt cassel was the taliban. i also heard that he pees gold dust. i also heard that he has a 170 iq but is too embarrassed to tell anybody. I heard that matt cassel has the penis of jesus christ grafted on to his penis. matt cassel with make you rich but matt cassel will also make you cry. use matt cassel at your own risk.
Paddy,
I hope it is a joke, but sometimes I wonder about our friend Timmy and his man-crush on Pollard. The only man-crush I EVER had after DT was TG, and I believe that was for GREAT reason.
I feel sorry for you mikeshaw….
It seems Cassels poison has grown so deep in you that you are beyond saving. You will be missed.
Haha. Yeah Paddy, I am from Australia. Been reading A-A for a good 4-5 years now.
Cassel