Jason Whitlock once dubbed Jared Allen the Space Cowboy, a name that never really stuck. My nickname for him, the One Man Gang, at least seemed to stick around here, and it sure seems valid right about now. After all, it looks like Jared put his once-in-a-lifetime contract above the entire Chiefs family–Kansas City, his teammates, the front office and, most of all, the fans. I can’t say that I blame him, except that I kind of feel like Jared’s relationship with Kansas City and the fans was a facade. That’s why I’m thinking Space Cowboy might actually be a better moniker for him right about now…
Some people call me the space cowboy, yeah
Some call me the gangster of love
Some people call me Maurice
Cause I speak of the pompitus of love.
People talk about me, baby
Say I’m doin’ you wrong, doin’ you wrong
Well, don’t you worry baby
Don’t worry cause I’m right here, right here, right here,
right here at homeCause I’m a picker
I’m a grinner
I’m a lover
And I’m a sinner
I play my music in the sun.
I’m a joker
I’m a smoker
I’m a midnight toker
I get my loving on the run… wooo woooo… – Steve Miller’s “The Joker”
Whether it was because he was the Space Cowboy off the field, or the Gangster of Love on it, Chiefs fans cherished Jared Allen. When he got his DUIs, a lot of people did worry and, myself included, said that he had done us wrong and didn’t deserve his big raise. Such raises were instead reserved for star players like Larry Johnson and Tony Gonzalez, players who had performed well on the field and off of it. But somehow he soothed our worries, got his suspension cut in half and convinced us that he was a Chief-for-life reborn, despite earlier comments to the contrary.
And that was just for those of us who were skeptical. Most fans already had taken the bait–hook line and sinker. But eventually we all did.
I’m not sure if Jared’s popularity was because of his play; his hustle, calf-ropin’ celebrations and Honkey sensibilities; or more due to his accessibility and down-to-earth nature. Regardless, his popularity even exceeded that of Tony Gonzalez. I guess Tony is kinda still looked at as the California kid, and not really a true Kansas Citian. The natives tend to get turned off by vegan shakes and commitment ceremonies, I suppose. L.J. has similar issues; he’s a nice guy who’s probably too private, sophisticated and urban for his own good in a town like K.C.(and, yes, he was overly demonstrative one game…heaven forbid…I’m competitive,too, I understand).
I like a little variety on my favorite team, and as long as they’re loyal, stay out of trouble and make plays on Sundays, I’ve got their back. Not most Chiefs fans–they want someone like Jared.
I can say all this because Boomer Grigsby–who had basically none of Jared’s talent, but all of his personality and then some–was just as popular as No. 69. Whether it was because of his skin, his style or his sacks, or all of the above, Jared had the entire City of Fountains wrapped around his finger.
(By the way, let’s not go overboard on the Chris Long love because he’s also a White defensive end with a high motor, and his old man reminds us of J.A. Skeet Ulrich looks a helluva lot like Johnny Depp, but Skeet can’t act for shit when compared to Johnny. Catch my drift?)
Then, during last season, Jared was a picker, a grinner, a lover and a sinner, and every Sunday, boy, did he ever play his music in the sun (except in the fourth quarter–zero sacks!). With the way he played, his new K.C. restaurant and his relationship with fans and teammates, we all thought he was here for good. He wanted things to appear that way, but deep down he knew differently.
Jared knew the Chiefs were a somewhat frugal organization, which isn’t always a bad thing. He knew that he had made his own bed with a checkered pre-Chiefs past and two DUIs as a Chief. He knew he would never get his highest-paid-defender-in-the-NFL riches in BBQ Bedlam. That’s why he signed the deal he did last year, quit drinking (we’ll see if that lasts), said all the right things and played like a man possessed. Well, for the first three quarters of games at least. It was a contract year and he played the part, did what he had to do to get that money. I don’t blame him for the plan, I blame him for pulling the wool over our eyes.
When this offseason rolled around, he let his real plan unfold. He knew he wasn’t going to get Marlon Brando Superman dough from the Chiefs, but he had an out. Carl Peterson. Everybody’s villain. He knew that right or wrong, if he went to war with Peterson that not only would he emerge as the good guy, but he’d likely become the NFL’s richest DE. After all, he read the Chiefs blogosphere from time to time. Dude knew we were fed up with King Carl, ready to dethrone his ass. He knew we were frustrated by his five-year-but-going-on-twenty plan, his lengthy contract disputes, draft reaches and bargain-bin free agents. He knew the journalist ogre Joeson Posnansklock and the rest of the Star would dive in to save him before checking the waters. He knew that most of the blogosphere would do the same.
Not me. I’m lots of things, but I ain’t no sucker. I also bleed Red and Gold, more so it appears than certain players. Certain ex-players now.
I’ll admit, Jared was a great player and a decent, entertaining dude, but let’s not get carried away. Homeboy orchestrated his escape from Arrowhead pretty damn fast for this to have been a spur-of-the-moment decision. He fooled us, folks. He won our hearts, then ran off for a payday. Like the song, lovin’ on the run. Because of this, I thank him for his outstanding play and all the fond memories, but I’m not shedding any tears. He obviously didn’t want to be a Chief, so, personally, I didn’t want him to be one any longer either.
You think Derrick Thomas, Tony G or Will Shields would have hightailed it out of town just because they had a little scrape or two with Carl? No effin’ way. They both had lots of scrapes with Carl, same with L.J and many other Chiefs. Jared’s behavior, and his insistence on a ridiculous contract (yes, $75 M with $30 M guaranteed is a boatload of cash for basically an alcoholic in remission with an extensive history of DUIs) despite that behavior, forced our hand.
I’m not a Carl Peterson fan either. If you’ve been here all offseason, then you know that right after the season I called for him to step down as G.M. and move to the business side of operations. He’s screwed up royally, and deserved to be fired following the 4-12 season. Still, in this situation, he was right. Not only was Peterson right, he came out of last night’s trade a winner.
Not only did he convince another team to give a “young man at risk” (his words, not mine) Dwight-Freeney-and-then-some money when we weren’t going to pay him anything close to that, he got a middle first rounder and two third round picks, all 2008 picks, out of the deal. If Minnesota was smart they would have waited until after the draft to have signed him, poison pilled us and given us two later first-round picks, one in 2009 and one in 2010. But somehow King Carl convinced those purple jesters up in the Twin Cities that we actually might match a deal. Well, I can’t give all the credit to Carl. I’m sure the Vikings realized that Tarvaris Jackson can only take a team so far, too.
The fallout, regardless if you agree with me or not, is that Jared is gone, Carl is still king and the Chiefs have the opportunity to have their best draft in franchise history. With three top 40 picks, six picks in the top 100 and the most trade value chart points of any team, the Chiefs control this draft’s destiny. That’s especially true considering that the Chiefs own the prime real estate that is the No. 5 overall pick, for sure to be the target of multiple potential trades.
Now that I’ve let it all out on this one, I’m going to move on to what kind of damage we can do with the plethora of picks we’ve assembled. Watch out for “Adam’s Draft Apples,” the guys I covet heading into the draft, dropping before the weekend. For now, make sure to sound off yourselves on the Jared Allen trade.
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bigchief13.. Or should I say big_____13… I KNOW you aint comin’ at me. You? What?? …
“Allen was the only reason to watch the chiefs play last year”
… What kinda fan says that??? Do you not remember seeing the arrival of Dawayne Bowe? Do you NOT remember seeing Tony Gonzalez make history?? What about watching our defense become one of the best in the league?? EVERY season has its pros and DEFINITELY and OBVIOUSLY its cons…. but in your little comment you posted, you shit on your own team and fellow fans.
“This is absolutely ridiculous. Just be prepaired for the same to happen when your next favorite chief becomes a probowler and wants more money, then you can start hating him as well.”
….. Whats are the names of those other 2 guys on our team who were pro bowlers and “wanted more money”??? OH!! THATS RIGHT!! Larry Johnson! Tony Gonzalez! I dont think I ever hated them.
Dont come at me like that big_____13, I’ll back you down everytime.
So you can choke on that… big_____13.
just wait DJ will get signed THIS YEAR
“over-estimated you mental capacity. ”
If you insult somebody’s intelligence, it’s probably not a good idea to sound like the sixth grader who thinks you’re an alcoholic.
And there is no problem with drinking every weekend. What is a problem is getting four DUIs in less than eight years or so. That probably means he has an alcohol problem, dude. Just a shot in the dark.
bigchief13, I try not to come at Chiefs fans, but if you don’t shape up the comment executioner is going to have to come out.
Yup. And why?? Cause he DESERVES it. NOT cause he put up good numbers ONE year. Cause he has progressed and become one of the most underated LBs in the league! Robbed from the Pro Bowl last year. For real. And yet… A GREAT player ON and OFF the field.
FYI, if anybody wants to defend Jared in a post, send me a rock-solid piece and I’ll post it. You better bring it, though. E-mail me at arrowheadaddict@gmail.com with what you’ve got if you think you are up to the task. If it’s well written and thought provoking I’ll post it.
Adam… Take it easy bro. Theres no need for the Comment Executor! He hasnt gone too far… But if he does… I’ll hand you the axe… Unless you want me to take care of it… Cause I think people here know that I CAN. Hahaha! Ask J.D. The ViQueens fan… You can call me, the Comment Assassin.
Comment Executioner… my bad.
Gentlemen, ticket holders, and pundits,
I respect the frustration that many of you have leveled at the Chiefs and at me personally.
I appreciate your intensity and will to win.
In turn, I hope you appreciate how difficult it is for me to maintain my impeccable television image, with perfectally parted hair, camel hair blazers, and a shine from my perfect teeth. It’s hard work, and at times, I admit, is a distraction that causes me to say, well, admittedly statements that can only be considered completely asinine, foolish, and ego-driven.
Examples? Sure.
How about making the comment last year about how we’d surely draft Brady Quinn if he was there. Ok, I guess that did send a message to the Browns to trade up and get him in front of us… but hey… we’re gonna be on HBO and I need to practice my sound bites!
Another? Ok, I guess “young man at risk” was maybe best served in private, between Jared and his agent. I guess I can see how someone may be offended in the public domain… but maybe I’ll mention them on my next appearance on the NFL Network.
Finally, I do think, from a psyeudonym perspective that this deal ends up looking good, if I indeed ensure stellar picks. I’ve been watching the Chargers and the Patriots and I’m sure I can find another Jason Medlock, er… Trazelle Jenkins, er…. Sly Morris, er…. I know… Ryan “move up and take him early” Sims. Oh, wait. Never mind.
And while I’m dishing off parting salvos…. please be sure to catch my next appearance on Deal or No Deal (I’m the banker). I hope that no one ever figures out that each year we manage to end the year well under the available cap — so we can spring for more Hair Stickem. (I pray that no one well ever question me for not resigning our players and pro-rating the cap hit into the current year — and thus freeing up for other years to be active, as needed).
So enjoy… if you want to call in and listen to the strategery room on Saturday – 900-MT-AHEAD.
Wow. He finally graces us with his presence. All hail the King…lol
Great post. I feel for the Chiefs though. All of those picks are great, too bad that King Carl is doing the choosing.
Actually, he is not. He has given that responsibility to Herm and the staff. Carl is actually going to be less involved this year than he ever has been.
You guys are the single most pig-headed, misunderstanding, gates in the wind. Like talking to bricks. The whole Allen trade scenario was a bad idea, it is what it is, don’t trash Allen over it, he’s an excellent player who did a ton of good while he was here. Don’t call someone an acoholic unless you know for a fact he is, “Mr. I Once Was An Alcoholic Poor Me”, you should understand that. Roc, you say I’m shitting on fans? I’m not a true Chief fan? What about you guys and your pussy stadium boycott? Thats what true fans do right. You are a bunch of hypocritical bastards. And Jason, by listing those stats you pretty much destroyed your whole arguement. Get real. No need to even reply to this comment as I am now out. Comment executioner? How old are you? I have been here for a year now and thats long enough to see that your great opinion on things changes every other day. You sure know how to stand by your comments. Good luck with your conflicting and yet repetative forums. I hope you are at least making some money for this garbage. Go Chiefs!!!!!!
Adam, my opinions are based on knowing him for 10 years, on understanding that he made severe mistakes and has acted to correct them, and on seeing the negotiation tactics of Peterson on each year of the restricted and unrestricted years. Jared made the mistakes and has paid for them dearly. My entire point was in reply to your piece and the huge flip-flop that has been evident on these very pages. When the trade winds blew, all of a sudden the same fans that loved him are saying he wasn’t deserving of his desired contract. My points are valid, correct and true. Enjoy the cellar of the west.
He loved it here and never held out or did anything more than ask to be traded when it was evident that CP was not going to pay. Jared respected and loved the fans of KC. They returned the favor only until it was time to pay. Then they flipped for Carl’s PR and left Jared hanging as “Not worth the money”. Wait and see…he’ll deliver (again) but in Minnesota.
CalChief,
That’s fine that you’ve known Jared for 10 years. I’ve known the Chiefs for almost 30 now, ever since I was born in K.C.’s St. Luke’s hospital. My loyalties lie with the Chiefs, not your buddy. From where I’m sitting, it doesn’t look like he ever cared that much, instead just soaking in the adulation until he got his payday. By the way, I have never said to pay Jared anything close to what he got. Just a ridiculous contract given what he’s accomplished and his track record off the field.
And there was no flip-flop here, partner. Check out my stance from one year ago: http://arrowheadaddict.com/2007/05/21/back-in-time-to-chime-in-on-allen/
Again, I wish Jared well and have no hard feelings. I just prefer the picks, the cap room and players who actually want to wear the Red and Gold.
BigChief,
One man’s trash is another man’s treasure, I guess, because we had over 5,000 unique visits today. And if it’s such garbage, then why have you been kicking it here for a year? Go start your own site and see how far that takes you.
As for my views, they only change as situations change. Ask any of our loyal readers–I’m pretty stubborn and set in my opinions and I’m definitely not a flip-flopper. I’m not a fence sitter, and not afraid to take bold stances (see Matt Ryan).
Lol…I never said I was an alcoholic, douchebag. And you know what, acts like an alcoholic, sounds like an alcoholic, I’m going to call him an alcoholic. Or at least say dude had a drinking problem. Either that or he’s just a fucking moron and wasn’t smart enough to get cabs or limos. Personally, from what I heard, dude had a drinking/partying problem. And don’t knock me for being honest about myself. I’m just saying I understand Jared, but you have to understand the Chiefs from a business standpoint, which you are obviously not willing to do.
What are you, Jared’s fucking agent? I hope he gave you a big chunk of his signing bonus for being loyal. Oh yeah, Jared could give two shits about loyalty.
And what’s wrong with boycotting buying tickets from a team that won’t spend on FAs? Carl is slowly changing our minds, but we had to send a message, whether it was received or not, that Chiefs fans will not be taken advantage of, nor accept the bare minimum. We deserve better, and we wanted to speak up on behalf of our readers. What’s more loyal than that? Pussy? I actually think it takes balls. I’ve been going to Arrowhead for three decades and hate not going to games, but I would to prove a point. And so my conscience can rest at night.
Don’t let the door hit you either. We treat our readers with respect, and have plenty of people who enjoy this site. We also enjoy our reader’s input when they are respectful, which you have not been. You are obviously more of a Jared fan than a Chiefs fan. Why don’t you go get yourself a Vikes jersey and a horn and go blow on it. I gave you a chance to defend Jared civilly, but you had to be a prick. Why? Because you knew you were coming to a gunfight with a knife and had no argument.
Hit the road, Jack. The comment executioner has struck.
Zach’s right, Bill Kuharich, Herm and Ray Farmer will do the picking, with Clark and Carl signing off. It’s worked pretty well thus far.
I get the feeling big chief liked Jared and might be an America Indian as offended as he gets about alcohol. Don’t be a turn-coat bigchief! Just because you don’t agree with everything we say doesn’t mean you have to throw a fit homie!
For those throwing the “at risk” label liberally, by the way… is there really a difference between losing a player for a full year because of DUI and losing a player for a full year because of injury?
I already cited Big Ben and Winslow as examples of “at risk” players that had stellar seasons in 2007. What about Larry Johnson–the Chiefs could have easily labeled him as “at risk” because he was run into the ground in 2006 and history showed that these 400+ carry workhorses typically get injured the following year. What about Priest Holmes, who was given a major contract extension after major hip surgery? What about Drew Brees, who was given a huge contract in spite of having a busted shoulder the year prior, then went on to have a pro bowl season?
The “at risk” label is a reason, but it’s hardly an excuse. A lot of players you sign are going to be at risk to miss an entire season of action.
what did i say that destroyed my point? if you cant comprehend ill simplify, ben is protected by his team in the offensive gameplan. winslow hasnt EVEN GOTTEN AN EXTENSION and talk about injury prone
the difference with an injury is THAT THE PLAYER HAS NO CONTROL OVER IT! WITHA DUI THATS A DECISION THAT GUY MADE! ARE YOU STUPID?
Easy, Jase. Jon’s a solid part of this community, unlike, oh, bigchiefs.
I think you both have points. I do have a problem with pro athletes getting on motorcycles–wait until you retire! The injury thing is a bit of a stretch, though. They are a risk, but all NFL players share that risk, really. Some just have higher probabilities.
I couldn’t even read your entire article. I couldn’t get past your use of the term “Honkey” and your other racist language. Grow up.
I’m a racist? I’m a white guy from Springfield, MO. Get a sense of humor and get real. I just honestly think if Jared Allen were Black and L.J. were White their popularity would have been equal in K.C. I’m just being honest, which is a huge part of growing up
sorry about the stupid bigchief had me all steamed
carl is an idiot!!!!!!!!!!
PERIOD
Wow. Adam, this is your website?
You sure make yourself look childish to the world when you get all whiny at someone posting comments in response to your article, and start using names like you did. I came across this place looking for opinions of the Jared Allen deal.
Whether you can write or not, it might help to read more carefully. That bigchief guy specifically named people like ROC and Jason and “Mr. I was an alcoholic”, and then you come back whining that he made those statements about YOU. lol.
hey buddy…how bout you worry about yourself and go observe your uncle doinkin your sister…your right..this is adam’s site and this is zach’s site…and this is our site…but the 2 guys that started this all have the right to say whatever it is they feel like saying..including that you, buddy, are a fucking moron and have no reason even coming here let alone posting on a CHIEFS site…your probably a faggot ass faiders fan..or you like to ride donkeys..either way thats your choice and what is said by adam on his site should be critisized by no one