With the NFL season creeping closer, it's time for Defector's annual "Why Your Team Sucks" series to ramp up. The Kansas City Chiefs posted their first losing season in over a decade, so they're much earlier on the slate than usual. And, as anyone who is aware of the series knows, they didn't hold back on why they believe the Chiefs suck.
For those who aren't familiar with the series, Defector goes through every team in the league and absolutely annihilates them. It doesn't matter if you won the Super Bowl or posted the worst record in the league, you're on equal footing during this series.
Drew Magary crafted the Chiefs' "Why Your Team Sucks" edition and, as mentioned, he didn't go easy on them. The series' talking points are recapping the previous season and then discussing the head coach, quarterback, "What's new that sucks", "What has always sucked", "What might not suck", and then a section that includes ramblings from fans. It's worth noting that if you aren't the kind of person who can laugh at/with your team, this series probably isn't for you.
Chiefs absolutely roasted in brutal ‘Why Your Team Sucks’ feature
In the recap from last year, one that fans don't want to be reminded of, Magary gave a brutally honest assessment of why the 2025 season fell apart for Kansas City. Cover your eyes, Chiefs fans.
"Because these Chiefs were dogs***. You can only get away with having no wideouts, no running game, and a series of guest stars at left tackle for so long before s*** goes haywire. That’s why the 2025 Chiefs went 1-5 in their own division," Magary wrote.
Fair. The Chiefs didn't give Patrick Mahomes much to work with at all last year and that, paired with the defensive regression, came back to bite the team. K.C. won just six games and missed the playoffs for the first time since 2014.
In the "What's new that sucks" section, Magary touches on how the Chiefs signed Kenneth Walker in the hopes that he'd be the spark their backfield needs. He's not convinced it's going to work out in their favor though.
"So here’s reigning Super Bowl MVP Kenneth Walker, who has never topped 1,100 yards rushing in a season, to finally give KC a threat in the backfield," Magary wrote. "Do I trust Andy Reid to actually use Walker when he hasn’t used a running back properly since Brian Westbrook? I do not. Do I expect Mahomes to audible out of every run call so that he and Kelce can pretend it’s still 2022? Absolutely. Why would I expect any of these people to change?"
He's got a point. Andy Reid does tend to ignore the run game for whatever reason but Chiefs fans are really hoping that's not the case, especially with Walker in town and Mahomes returning from injury.
Magary also pointed out how the Chiefs didn't do much at all in the receiving game either. He argued that Kelce should have retired by now and that Rashee Rice, Xavier Worthy, and Tyquan Thornton are not going to get the job done. Fair, as Chiefs fans don't feel all that confident that this trio is the right group for the job.
He also slammed the defense and the offensive tackles and does not have faith that Walker will be able to remain healthy. On the defense, Magary called out the Chiefs signing L'Jarius Sneed and said "These guys are so done I can see the grill marks on them."
In the "What's always sucked" section, Magary was quite blunt in saying that Kansas City's reign at the top of the league is over.
"It’s over. You got your three titles this century; now it’s back to being the bright red failures you’ve always been. Mahomes is washed. Kelce is washed. Jones is washed. Butker is washed. The coaching staff is three levels beyond washed," Magary wrote. "The future belongs elsewhere now, and I couldn’t be happier."
Tell us how you really feel.
Hey, that's the point of this series though. The author isn't supposed to pull any punches with these assessments and Magary made sure we knew how he felt about the Kansas City Chiefs. Hopefully, the Chiefs prove him wrong and continue to be a Super Bowl contender for the foreseeable future.
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