So, after Paddy put together a great piece on the crucial offseason question: “If Chiefs Were Characters from the Wire,” I felt it necessary to move this important thought-experiment beyond the realist, Dickensian epic about the failures of city institutions to the world of fantasy. If there are any of you out there who still haven’t gotten hooked on Game of Thrones, get on it (but watch the first two episodes before passing judgment; the first one is a bit scatter-brained).

Furthermore, if you aren’t acquainted with the show, STOP READING THIS NOW, this is going to be chalk-full of spoilers.

Tamba Hali as Sandor Clegane, “The Hound”

"I smell Philip Rivers."

Tamba Hali is a big, scary, not-particularly-pretty man. He has been loyal to the Chiefs through leadership changes, which have included a variety of eccentric characters on the throne. Although he terrifies everyone around him, everyone that serves at his side realizes he is a man of honor who lives to massacre quarterbacks – just don’t get fire anywhere near him or he’ll go all Frankenstein on you.

Denny Medley-US PRESSWIRE

Todd Haley as Joffry Baratheon

"We shall go forth on 4th down a 4th time!"

Egotistical, sadistic, deluded and an awful tactician when it counts. On the plus side, um … cool crossbow?

David Butler II-US PRESSWIRE

Matt Cassel as Daenerys Targaryen

"You're not just going to throw out my appendix after the surgery, right? Whew, what a waste that would have been."

Essentially sold in a marriage-trade that was meant to allow the Chiefs to reconquer Westeros, Cassel spent 2009 powerless, being repeatedly raped behind a horrid offensive line with no friends or allies to throw to. But, after facing down trials and tribulations, Cassel grew in strength and confidence, giving birth to dragons and … breaking his hand and watching his division rival ride out his team to the lost year’s best victories … this metaphor needs some work.

John Rieger-US PRESSWIRE

Casey Wiegmann as Ser Rodrik Cassel (absolutely no relation to Matt Cassel)

"Roadkill is the new black."

Old, wizened and dependable. If it wouldn’t have gotten in the way for Casey’s gameplay, these two men would have undoubtedly shared the same hairstyle as they held down the fort defending the House of Stark. However, despite their reliability, at some point, it was time for some young gun to behead them both.

Michael Hickey-US PRESSWIRE

Jon McGraw as Tywin Lannister

"I just one deep back safetied your mom."

Although respected and decorated, these veterans have been outfoxed by younger, faster competition. However, with the game on the line, these old hands know how to pull out a victory.

Rob Grabowski-US PRESSWIRE

Dwayne Bowe as Bronn

"Right back at you Cassel. No, I don't think I'm going to aim for your 'general vicinity' with this one."

Not everyone likes him, his style or his attitude. But, everyone agrees, this man is damn effective at what he does.

Brian Spurlock-US PRESSWIRE

Scott Pioli as Petyr Baelish “Little Finger”

"As a matter of fact, yes, I do run a whore house."

The ultimate man behind the curtain, Pioli has used his suspicious seduction and mischief to build a winning team in record time. Everyone has to watch their back around this man.

Denny Medley-US PRESSWIRE

Dontari Poe as Gregor Clegane, “The Mountain”

"Ok, yes. I may have eaten one or two practice squad kickers. But, if you don't want me to eat special teamers, why do you leave them lying around all the time?!"

He is big, strong and furious. He can behead a horse with a single blow, and yet we’ve seen him do little more than lose jousts to effeminate challengers and guard a burnt-out prison camp. Will his amazing strength and power actually come to use on the battlefield?

Douglas Jones-US PRESSWIRE

Romeo Crennel as Tyrion Lannister

Seriously, why has no one made a similar mural for Crennel yet?

A master strategist with a heart of gold. While he has rarely gotten credit for his work, Crennel has been an essential part of the family and saved it from total destruction at the end of the season.

Denny Medley-US PRESSWIRE

Chan Gailey as Balon Greyjoy

"I left potato salad in the workroom fridge. I will take back what is mine."

What, you don’t see the resemblance? Aside from that, these two are bitter men who live in their cold miserable bitterness in the North, waiting to strike back revenge in Week 2.

Robert Mayer-US PRESSWIRE

Derrick Johnson as Khal Drogo

"My helmet protects you."

The Horse King will hurt you, and he will do it in the most badass way available to him. But, please, Chiefs medical personnel, do not resort to black magic to cure his infections.

Rob Grabowski-US PRESSWIRE

Barry Richardson as Samwell Tarly

"Time for my signature move -- Contagious Incompetence!"

Fat, whiney and utterly useless. I hope the White Walkers got ‘im at the end of last season.

Michael Hickey-US PRESSWIRE

Last week the Chiefs announced that they had re-signed back up tight end Jake O’Connell. When I heard this news my exact thoughts were “I’m not upset that they re-signed him, but he certainly wouldn’t make my list of Top 10 Free Agents that I’d like the Chiefs to re-sign.” Which then got me to thinking, who exactly would be on my list? Obviously, we all can agree that Dwayne Bowe and Brandon Carr are the top priority, but on a team that lacked quality depth last year, what other players should we be hoping the Chiefs bring back? I gave it some thought and came up with the following list.

Let’s get started:

10. Amon Gordon

Nov 21, 2011; Foxboro, MA, USA; Kansas City Chiefs defensive end Amon Gordon (99) lines up against the New England Patriots during the first quarter at Gillette Stadium. The Patriots defeated to Chiefs 34-3. Mandatory Credit: Stew Milne-US PRESSWIRE

Gordon was a pleasant surprise last year. He basically walked in off the street last year and locked down the backup nose tackle spot. He even managed to rack up a couple of sacks, which is something that KC’s other “big boys” haven’t been able to do. The down side is that his play kept Jerrell Powe off the field. Speculation is that Kelly Gregg won’t be back and Gordon would be cheap depth for whomever KC brings in to be the new starting NT.

The other two players I considered for this number 10 spot were Barry Richardson and Leonard Pope, both of whom were starters last season. Richardson would provide quality depth if he was brought back as the backup swing tackle, but ultimately I’m so afraid of the Chiefs trying to start him again that I decided to leave him off the list altogether. With Moeaki coming back from injury I’d like to see KC sign someone with more offensive upside then Pope for the number 2 TE spot.

The Kansas City Chiefs are preparing for what is turning out to be a pretty hyped up game against the Denver Broncos this Sunday.

The media is gobbling up the whole Kyle Orton vs. Tim Tebow storyline. It isn’t the most exciting QB duel I’ve ever heard of but there is some history here that will make the game interesting.

On the injury front, the Chiefs released their first report of the week today. There were only two players on the list.

(more…)

But I know what you’re saying: “What? McGraw? You mean the nursing-home guy so slow he’d be faster playing safety mounted on a Rascal? The guy so frail and uncoordinated in his senile, injury-riddled last years that he can hardly make a tackle?”

Yes, him. If you want to know why, you have to click below. (more…)

The Kansas City Chiefs have named safety Jon McGraw (former K-Stater) as their team’s recipient of this year’s Ed Block Courage Award.

The award, named after former Colts athletic trainer Ed Block, is given to one recipient from each NFL team on a yearly basis and is considered one of the league’s most prestigious honors. The award is given to a player exemplifies commitment to the principles of sportsmanship and courage.

I would say Jon McGraw definitely shows those traits on a weekly basis.

(more…)

It appears those of us who thought the Chiefs preseason was meaningless owe those of you who knew better an apology. I was concerned, but I’ll admit I did not see this coming at all. It seemed impossible that we’d look as bad in the regular season as we did in the preseason. Unfortunately for us, Todd Haley has made the impossible possible.

There is always plenty of blame to go around after any lopsided loss, but from where I’m sitting this is a direct extension of Haley’s ridiculous training camp and preseason. And to his credit, he seems to get that. Our coach certainly has his flaws, but one thing I’ve always liked about him is he doesn’t grasp for excuses. Can you imagine what a Herm Edwards press conference would’ve been like after a loss like that? He would’ve blamed the lockout, mentioned how young we were, referenced injuries, and then closed with his sarcastic “Yeah, blame me, its all my fault.” Haley said to blame him, and he actually meant it. I appreciate that candor.

The problem is that he really is to blame.  He’s taken this team from division champion to, what, worst team in the NFL?  How did that happen?  How can a team with this much talent look SO MUCH worse than literally everyone else?

The hardest part about Sunday, for me, was the insufferable Bills fans. I was surrounded by them. You’d think Bills fans, of all people, would feel a certain kinship with us. I’ve always tactitly rooted for them, or at least felt bad for them. I assumed they felt that way about us, too. But we’ve lost to the Bills thrice since I moved to Brooklyn, and their fans have been total pricks every time.

When the Chiefs are losing badly, I like to bust out the tomahawk chop. I feel like its a good way to show everyone Chiefs fans are good-natured, and don’t take ourselves too seriously. It also takes the sting out when you’re down 30, and it’s good for a laugh. The local Bills fans, unfortunately, aren’t smart enough to understand this. They think I’m being aggressive. And their response to that, unbelievably, is to sarcastically chop back at me the worse the score gets. It’s really something.  Twenty fans of a perennially awful team angrily mocking a man who was only trying to clown around and admit defeat. These are guys who wear ironic mustaches and still think its the funniest thing in the world. It’s like they’re just a little behind the rest of the country. No self-awareness, seemingly. They’ve somehow forgotten their team’s name is synonymous with failure, and has been for 20 years.

But I digress. Chan Gailey, at least, I’m happy for. It’s got to feel good to know you’re a better coach than the guy who fired you. Kudos, Chan.

My pathetic game notes after le jump:

(more…)

ESPN’s John Clayton is reporting that the Kansas City Chiefs have agreed to terms with S Jon McGraw.

Thank God. I was worried “Quick Draw” wasn’t coming back.

This really isn’t a bad signing by the Chiefs, though they would be wise to make sure McGraw only sees the field on special teams and in emergency situations.

Quick Draw is still decent on special teams but he has lost a lot on his play at safety. Considering he was never better than average at safety to begin with, the Chiefs should avoid putting him in a situation where he can hurt them like he did against the Baltimore Ravens  in last year’s playoffs.

As I said earlier, signing guys like McGraw is all well and good but if the Chiefs don’t start adding some serious talent, they are going to miss out.

We all know that Jarrad was a steal when he was taken in the 7^th Round of the 2006 draft (the production from this 7^th round starter is undeniable).  Nicknamed “The Raider Killer” by Chiefs fans, Page has intercepted four balls against the Oakland Raiders dating back to his 2006 rookie season. Three of them have been in the red zone, and three of them have been game-winners, saving the Chiefs from a potential game-winning/tying drive.

His stats were quite impressive for a seventh rounder:

2006        Tackles:  35  Ints 3  Games Played:  16

2007        Tackles:  59  Ints 3  Games Played:  16

2008        Tackles:  85  Ints 4  Games Played:  16

2009        Tackles:  19  Ints 0  Games Played:    5

As you can see 2009 was a very down year for the young free safety.  His season was cut short by injury and at one point he lost his starting job to Jon McGraw (He was a healthy scratch against the Chargers).  So apparently he was in someone’s dog house for whatever reason.  (There were rumors that Haley was unhappy with the fact that Page was “doggin it” or would not play through injury, actually Haley said so after the Chargers game when speaking about Jon McGraw starting the Chargers game.  Page may have even been placed on IR as a result.  It is a safe assumption considering he was listed as a healthy scratch and then on IR soon thereafter).

In any event, Jarrad Page has shown some glimpses of greatness (ie.. against the Raiders) and some glimpses of badness (ie… missing tackles, blowing coverage, being out of position.)  He has been the starting FS on a team that has ranked next to dead last in the NFL for his entire stay in Kansas City.  Which begs the questions, should Scott Pioli sign Jarrad Page to a long term contract?  What is he worth?  Should he be our starting FS? Does Jarrad Page even want to stay in KC?

Jarrad Page places Scott Pioli in a precarious position.  Jarrad is young at 26 years old. As a GM, you hate to let young starters go to another team and become great. However, even though the talent of Page flashes brightly, it doesn’t flash more than his inconsistency.  If you do sign him; at what price do you pay?  How long? Could you spend the same money on another free agent who has performed better or who you believe will play better.  Would you be better off drafting a FS or signing a college free agent?  How much more does/did Jarrad Page add to the Chiefs defense?  Are the rumors true that was Jarrad “doggin it”? 

Personally, if we can sign him for cheap then do so. Offer him no guarantee, and find him some stiff starting competition.  One thing is for sure, there are only 32 starting free safety jobs in the NFL and yet there are literally thousands of players seeking one.  If I was Jarrad Page I would let Mr. Pioli know that I am on board 100% for the upcoming year, and get into a new contract as soon as possible.  Why?  What team in the NFL is going to sign Jarrad Page and make him a starter?  Just one right now:  The Chiefs and I would bet that Scott Pioli is not too enamored with Jarrad Page.  What do you think?