Wanted: The person or persons responsible for the murder of the 2011 Kansas City Chiefs home opener.

But first, we have to read you your rights.

You have the right to be really angry. Anything you say or do may make you feel better but it won’t make the Chiefs better. You have the right to vent your frustrations and engage in friendly, thereputic debate with other Chiefs fans on Arrowhead Addict. If you cannot do so in a respectful manner, without cursing and hurling personal insults, you will be asked to leave. Do you understand these rights as they have been read to you?

The Suspects

Dons and Bosses:

Scott “Substance Over Sizzle” Pioli

Occupation: GM, Mafia Don, Savior, Genius, Guy from New England

Pioli is being investigated for a number of crimes, including not being aggressive enough in free agency, drafting poorly and for not being Bill Belichick.

He was brought in for questioning but did not answer any of them.

Todd “It’s All Part Of The Plan” Haley

Occupation: Head football coach, amateur golfer, Grump, Curmudgeon, President of the Thom Jones Fan Club, Former President of the Mike Brown Fan Club, Secretary of the Sabby Piscitelli Alliance

Haley is wanted for questioning in the disappearance of Jon Baldwin, the appearance of Sabby Piscitelli, the kidnapping and imprisonment of Jamaal Charles, and for wearing a skull cap in doors. He is also being investigated for his role in what officials are calling “The Kansas City Chiefs Preseason Ponzi Scheme.” The scheme was said to pay dividends to players in fans without any work earned on the practice field.

He was brought in for questioning, but pretended not to understand any of the questions. Possible insanity defense.

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Early in the 2010 season, Dexter McCluster was looking like a brilliant pick by Kansas City Chiefs GM Scott Pioli.

McCluster helped the Chiefs upset the San Diego Chargers on Monday Night Football by returning a punt for a touchdown. It was the longest punt return in the team’s storied history.

Against the San Francisco 49ers, McCluster caught a pass in the flat from Matt Cassel. The little dynamo raced up the sidelines before taking flight from the five-yardline for the touchdown.

Yes, early in 2010, McCluster looked to be every bit of the playmaker fans hoped he would be. Unfortunately for Dexter, however, a high-ankle sprain put the rookie on the shelf for a number of weeks.  When he returned, it was clear McCluster had lost some of his shiftiness and burst that made him so dangerous early in the year. He was a virtual non-factor the rest of the season.

The Chiefs drafted McCluster to primarily play receiver. The team was looking for players with speed and play-making ability in 2010 so the pick made sense at the time. McCluster, however, had trouble making an impact as a slot receiver. He was a rookie without a lot of experience playing the position. The fact that the Chiefs had so few receiving threats made it even more difficult for McCluster to stand out.

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This is a series I started way back when and that I bust out every once in a while.  The premise is simple. I list five unlikely and fantastical ways that I would like to see the Kansas City Chiefs win a game in the upcoming season. This column used to have a lot more meaning because, quite frankly, the Chiefs winning a game by normal means used to be pretty fantastical itself. Now that they are winning, however, perhaps this will be even more fun.

Or maybe not.

Let’s get to it.

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The Kansas City Chiefs have a really, really hard schedule in 2011.

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! Everybody freak out! The sky is falling. The Chiefs are going to go 4-12. Herm Edwards is going to coach the Lions to 4 straight Super Bowl victories.

Nooooooooooooooooooo!

Got that out of your system? Good.

Look, I’m not going to BS you guys. This schedule is going to be tough. If all of the teams on the 2011 schedule play like they did in 2010 and the Kansas City Chiefs play like they did in 2010 in 2011, the 2010 Kansas City Chiefs are probably going to have a tough time in 2011.

Fortunately the 2010 Kansas City Chiefs will not be playing in 2011 and not because of the lockout. The reality is that it will be the 2011 Kansas City Chiefs playing the 2011 schedule and chances are, the 2011 Kansas City Chiefs will be an entirely different team.

I understand the fear. A lot of these teams on the 2011 schedule were really good last year. Some of the ones that weren’t that good last year, or that were only average, still whipped the Chiefs like a government mule. See the Chargers in SD, the Broncos in Denver and the Raiders in KC for evidence of this.

That being said, in the NFL, there are no guarantees. When we view this new schedule, I think most of us are viewing it as if the 2010 Chiefs were going to play it. The fact of the matter is that next week will be the NFL Draft and at some point, probably over the summer, there will probably be free agency.

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Tamba may be the man but guys like Glenn Dorsey, Jovan Belcher, Derrick Johnson and Wallace Gilberry did their fair share of creating pressure on opposing QB's in 2010.

As we get ever closer to the NFl Draft, lists of team needs are thrown around like candy at a parade. Look up any list of team needs for the Kansas City Chiefs and you are almost guaranteed to see something similar to this:

WR

NT

OLB (pass rusher)

OT

One thing I always try to look out for while writing for AA is that I don’t allow myself to slip too far into the communities “group think.”

What does that mean?

When you get any group of people together to talk about a subject for any long period of time, I feel that group think tends to start to take over. What I mean by that is factions start to form where part of the group believes one thing. We certainly disagree about a lot around here but we also talk Chiefs so much that I think sometimes we, as a group, determine something to be absolutely true. Once everyone pretty much agrees, the idea tends to become fact among most of the group. At that point, I think we begin to lose a little bit of perspective.

Some commonly held beliefs around AA that I can think of off the top of my head are:

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Chiefs, Chiefs, toil and trouble.

Vrabel’s beers begin to bubble.

Weis has gone the way of Gailey.

Frightened you turn to AA daily.

Lockout news must have you shaken.

Pioli’s motives has Big Matt bakin.

Randy in a head-on-collision,

Has lead me to this grim decision.

Dark omens close from every side,

So let us go surf the blood-red tide,

And face the dark, case we be next

Lest Fortune’s fury leave us vext

If you have been reading Arrowhead Addict long enough then you know that we moonlight as a poetry blog. We’ve been featured on NFL.com and Sports Illustrated.com but we’ve also worked hard to show our nerdy side by being featured on National Public Radio.

We’re full of crap almost as much as we’re full of facts and hopefully that combination works for you enough to keep you coming back to get the news, analysis, commentary and whatever other demented thoughts happen to wander into one of our heads and escape through our fingers and onto the front page.

If my intro to this column seemed a little ominous it is because that is how I have been feeling lately when I think about Chiefs football. After a few years with the Chiefs at the bottom of the NFL totem poll, I think I got a little bit comfortable down there. You have nothing to fear when you are at the bottom and have nowhere to fall. It also makes it easy to dream so big that no desire seems too outlandish.

Now that the Chiefs have taken the express elevator back to the top of the AFC West, I am suddenly finding myself to be afraid of heights. It is a steep drop from up here and even though I know I should have more confidence, I am constantly looking around for the blow that will launch me from my perch into a terrifying free fall that will leave me looking at the ass end of the Oakland Raiders.

(Shudder)

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Bill Williamson of ESPN.com is now an honorary member of Chiefs Nation.

Williamson was the only one, of only three ESPN.com experts, to give Jamaal Charles proper credit in their positional power rankings for the best running backs in the NFL.

Basically, a panel of experts at ESPN ranked their top RB’s in order and then the players is assigned a score based on each individual ranking. The players with the highest scores are on top.

Here is a quick breakdown of who voted and how the points were assigned. See the full rankings here.

Key: JC=John Clayton; MS=Mike Sando; KS=Kevin Seifert; PY=Pat Yasinskas; TG=Tim Graham;
BW=Bill Williamson; JW=James Walker; PK=Paul Kuharsky
Rank: 1=10 points, 2=9 points, 3=8 points, 4=7 points, 5=6 points, etc.

I’ve been searching and searching for something for something to write about for my weekly column for days now and this appears to be it.

Willamson ranked Charles as the 2^nd best running back in the NFL, behind only Chris Johnson and ahead of Adrian Peterson. If you read this site with any amount of regularity, you know that I think Jamaal Charles was the best back in the NFL last year. I use his historically good yards-per-carry average as my evidence. If I were doing a set of rankings, Charles would be #1.

Now I’m not being a total homer here. I can see where other people, outside of the Chiefs Kingdom, might not rank Charles #1. Chris Johnson is awesome. Adrian Peterson has been very good for a while now. MJD is a beast.

Still, I have to take issue with WHERE some of these experts ranked Charles and I most certainly take issue with the hate mail Williamson has received from the good people of Minnesota.

Tim Graham and Tim Graham get a pass here because each ranked Charles as the 3^rd best back in the NFL. Both those guys had Peterson #1 and Johnson #3. I can live with that. I disagree, but they ranked Charles fairly.

Now to the rest of these guys.

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Paddy's Pot Of Gold makes it's triumphant return...hopefully soon to include a much better graphic.

KCChiefs.com when something occurred to me.

The Chiefs really are being built the right way.

This may not come as a big surprise to any of you as the team just had it’s biggest single season turnaround in franchise history but for me, it is the way the team turned things around that mattered.

There are a lot of doubts surrounding the 2010 Kansas City Chiefs. While everyone is happy that the team was once again competitive, the fact that KC had such an easy schedule has led many a Chiefs fan to wonder just how good the 2010 team was.

As I watched the 2010 highlight video, I was struck by just how many heroes came to the rescue for the Chiefs last season. You see, good teams always seem to have an endless supply of players that step up and come through when the team needs them.

Just off the top of my head I can think of multiple Chiefs players who were instrumental in key victories throughout the season.

Let’s take a look back:

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Yesterday, I brought you my blueprint on how to fix the defense. It required one to two free agent pickups and the use of the teams 1st round pick and their 1st pick in the 2nd round. You can see the full blue print here. In fact, if you haven’t read the defense post, do that first so this post makes more sense.

There are many ways the Chiefs can fix this football team. My blue prints could be dead wrong but I am giving it a go anyway! If you agree, or disagree, we want to here about it in the comments. The debate is what makes AA great. Hey, that rhymed. I should patent that. So lame…

I’ll follow the same format as yesterday. I will identify which players I think the Chiefs should keep, what the team’s positions of need are and how to fill them.

The blue print to offensive success is after the jump.

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Strap in, Addicts. I am going to give you my blue print for fixing the Chiefs defense in one season. I believe if the Chiefs follow my blue print for success, along with Romeo Crennel’s coaching, the Chiefs can have a top 10 defense as
early as next season. Let’s get started.

Fist let’s take a look at KC’s ascending players. These are players who are still young and who should improve with Crennel’s coaching and their furthered experience playing in the NFL. These are players who should hold on to their starting position and who do not need replacing.

DE Glenn Dorsey

DE Tyson Jackson

Dorsey and Jackson are going to be just fine. Mark my words. Dorsey is already fine, racking up over 50 tackles in his 2^nd season in the league and his 1^st season playing a new position. Before the dissenters start throwing out his sack totals, know that Glenn Dorsey was never a big sack guy, not even in college. Even when the Chiefs drafted him for the 4-3 they never expected him to put up big sack numbers. They wanted him to stuff the run and cause some pressure in the backfield. Dorsey did a good job of both last season. Does he need to improve his pass rush? Yes. The same goes for Jackson. However, it is important to remember that defensive lineman almost always take about 3 or 4 years to fully develop. Neither Dorsey, nor Jackson will ever be expected to put up huge sack totals playing in a 3-4. If they can work their way up to 4 or 5 a season and continue to improve vs. the run, they could be Pro Bowlers. The tools are there. Folks clamoring for the Chiefs to trade Dorsey are delusional.

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Chambers was much more productive as a Chief than he was as a Charger in 2009. Chambers played 9 games for the Chiefs, racking up 36 catches for 608 yards and 4 touchdowns.

Stretched over a 16 game season, Chambers would have produced 64 catches for 1080 yards and 6.4 touchdowns.

Perhaps, most importantly, Chambers gave the Chiefs the deep threat that they had been lacking. He has longs of 54, 30, 61, 39, 43, 24 and 18.

Chambers seems to be the perfect compliment to Dwayne Bowe’s physical style. The Chiefs were 3-6 with Chambers on the team and the only loss that can really be attributed to Chambers’ play, was the game against Buffalo where he dropped a pass near the 2 yard line that would have given the Chiefs a 1st and goal in a game they were trailing by 6. Chambers, usually sure handed, probably wouldn’t drop that ball twice.

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Why sign a DE when the Chiefs have two young, top 5 draft picks playing end already? Why indeed. I don’t want Peppers to play DE for the Chiefs. PEPPERS doesn’t want to play DE for the Chiefs, nor any other team for that matter.

He wants to play outside linebacker in a 3-4 defense.

See ya, Mike Vrabel.

Look, Mike Vrabel is great and everything but he is 34 and probably just had his last productive season. Even if he can manage to stay fairly productive, he is likely to get bitten by the injury bug ala Donnie Edwards.

Andy Studebaker or “Mike Vrabel Jr.” as I like to call him, is great. He has been a surprise and I would love to see what he could do, but he is still very young and may not be ready to bare the starting load just yet. Vrabel’s contract is up. I say let him go. He will be fairly expensive to resign and won’t be half as valuable as Peppers.

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It is the Chiefs fans 2010 January lament. Who can blame them?

It is hard to argue against the idea that the Chiefs did not improve in 2009. Their defense gave up only 16 fewer points than the 08’ squad. The offense scored a whopping 3 points more than Tyler Thigpen and the “Arrowspread” offense. The variance in the numbers between 08’ and 09’ are so minuscule that is it hard to find any real difference between the season that got Herman Edwards fired and the season Todd Haley lead the team, disappointing so many. To most long suffering Chiefs fans, it was just different faces getting the same results.

I’m not here to tell you not to be angry about all the losing. I am here to try to give you an objective look at why the Chiefs 09’ season was not a lateral move. I actually think Haley did a remarkable job, given the circumstances he inherited.

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The idea that the Chiefs should draft an offensive lineman with their first pick is very popular. It makes sense. The offensive line is bad and has been bad for some time. Matt Cassel needs protection and Charles needs running lanes. I myself have warned against not taking the improved performance of the offensive line in the second half of the season too seriously. However, after hearing many an argument and reviewing many a mock draft, I have decided that the Chiefs should forgo drafting an offensive lineman in the first round.

The opinion of most I have talked to is that the Chiefs should draft Russel Okung, a LT, and move Branden Albert to the right guard position. I believe moving Albert would be a huge mistake. The man has two seasons starting experience, is a very talented lineman and is a first round pick. He had a tough year last year but so did everyone else on the team, save Jamaal Charles. He was also adjusting to a new playing weight and a new offense. I think he can and will be the Chiefs left tackle of the future. Branden Albert doesn’t need to be moved to guard. He needs better men around him.

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Margaret: Damn  you! I have had fucking SOMEHWERE OVER DWAYNE BOWE stuck in my damn head all damn DAY!

And in honor of her, I am posting it again. Because it SHOULD be stuck in everyone’s head.

I, like many of you, want nothing more than to see the Chiefs win. I want to see them win so bad that I really don’t care how they accomplish it. If it happens by shady means, bad calls, video taping opposing teams defensive signals, whatever, it is OK with me as long as the Red and Gold come out on top.  So here are a few ways I wouldn’t mind seeing the Chiefs snag victories in 2010.

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