It occurred to me the other day that amidst all the HC/OC/DC/IWWA excitement around here these last few weeks, nobody at AA had yet continued our boy Whitlock’s tradition with a Chiefs report card.

I used to really look forward to Whitlock’s annual grades.  Not because they were accurate (although they were, for the most part).  It was just so much fun to read.  The entire roster, a smart little paragraph about each player.  Guaranteed to make you laugh a few times.  That article was a Chiefs gold mine every year.

I’ve been referred to as a poor man’s Whitlock (actually I believe the exact wording was “dumbsh*t Whitlock wannabe”).  So in true poor man fashion, I’ll be breaking this up into separate posts.  This week is the defense.  Because Lord knows we all love that defense.  Offense will be next week, and coaches, front office and ownership the week after.  Really licking my chops for that one, obviously.

Note: Expectations and contract do play into these grades.  Performance is obviously the most important aspect, but it has to be framed.  Amon Gordon has a higher grade than Glenn Dorsey, for instance.  That isn’t because I think Amon Gordon is better.  It’s because he was picked up off the street to be a backup, whereas Dorsey was drafted 5th overall to be the cornerstone of our defense.  I guess you could say we’re grading on a slight curve. 

Report card for the defense after the jump:

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"Hey Tyson, Matt Finucane, Arrowhead Addict. So how fat do you plan on getting next year?"

My initial intention was to give Pioli a grade like everyone else. However, I quickly realized any letter I assigned him would be completely arbitrary. As I’ve said, I’m inclined to give him more credit than Todd Haley for our turnaround. But that’s more a reflection of my feelings on Haley than Pioli. Haley may turn out to be a good coach, but a master architect he is most definitely not. If he were in charge his first order of business would probably be to extend Thom Jones’ contract.

People have been heaping praise on Scott Pioli from the second he got here.  He was immediately declared a personnel genius.  His drafting, which none of us knew anything about beforehand, was proclaimed a specialty.  His approval rating on Arrowheadpride has always been ridiculously high.  Hell, on this very site last week one of our commenters said Pioli “won 3 Super Bowls.” 

It’s hard for me to know which way to lean on this.  On a personal level, I don’t like Pioli.  The secrecy, the arrogance, The Patriot Way, it all rubs me wrong.  And yet here we are, back to respectability just 2 years after Herm and Carl (The Lie Guys) did their best to flush our reputation down the turlet.  Surely someone deserves credit for that.  If not Pioli, I’m having a hard time thinking of who that someone should be. 

more after the jump:

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