Waiting for football to comeback is like steeling yourself for six months without comfort food. Any comfort food. No pizza, no mashed potatoes, no doughnuts, no bacon, none of it. Until this Friday.
At least that’s how I feel – I suddenly have access to so much happiness that I’m not even sure what I want first. But I have an idea for a Chiefs recipe that will leave me fat and happy, at least until next week.
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Step 1: Set the Superdome to boil with a rabid crowd of away fans that will keep cheering even when QB Ricky Stanzi hands off to RB Jordan Roberts on a draw late in the 4th quarter. Wait until the stadium is about half red. Add beer for increased volume.
Step 2: Separate any players with the lightest of lingering injuries from the rest. Then, drop in at least two solid drives by the Chiefs offensive starters.
These should consist of:
- Five to eight touches by RB Jamaal Charles. It doesn’t matter how exactly he gets his hands on the ball, the more creative the better.
- About 100 yards of passing from QB Alex Smith, including receptions by the team’s exciting trio of tight ends and catches by at least two wide receivers not named Dwayne Bowe while the full starting ensemble is on the field.
- Interesting usage of WR Dexter McCluster, who should be set to finally shine.
- A big gainer by Bowe all the same, because he’s one of the best parts of the meal.
- At least one touchdown, but one more will make it all the sweeter.
Step 3: Once the Saints defense has been adequately humiliated, send on the Chiefs defense for a similar process of psychological warfare for three to four Saints possessions – because they’ll be short.
These should consist of:
- ILB Derrick Johnson stuffing a ball carrier behind the line of scrimmage at least once.
- One sack for each OLB, Tamba Hali and Houston.
- Allow all three to dance a bit. It’s good to let them burn hot for their field time before setting them aside on the bench to cool.
- A strong showing by the newest addition to the starting linebacker lineup – be it Akeem Jordan or Nico Johnson.
- The Chiefs secondary playing to its full potential against a talented Saints passing attack, including two pass breakups and, ideally, at least one turnover.
- Blitzes, lots of blitzes to wash away the sour aftertaste of the passive Crennel-style broth left the pot.
- A bit of penetration from the Chiefs D-line.
Step 4: After the starters are done (but still healthy), start filing in 2nd-and-3rd-teamers. The most important ingredient in this stage of the cooking is surprise. I don’t know who will step up once the starters are off the field, but the solid showing by the 1st team is best complimented with a few unexpected standout performances by depth players.
For best flavor, this stage should include:
- A sign that WR Jon Baldwin is (finally) developing and other young receivers like Donnie Avery, Devon Wyle, Junior Hemingway, and Josh Bellamy and can provide delicious depth.
- Some noteworthy performances from the backup D-linemen I’ve been hearing about in practice reports.
- Solid all-around play by backup safeties Quintin Demps and Husain Abdullah because Kendrick Lewis’ durability is a major concern for me.
- Leave QB Chase Daniel in there until he shows a consistent consistency. While I’m high on the guy from past preseason performances and from his pedigree of being brought up as Drew Brees’ sole backup, reports from training camp have described his play thus far as up-and-down.
- Enough potential from QB Tyler Bray to warrant a roster spot. By all accounts, he has the strongest arm in camp. Hopefully he can show enough that the Chiefs won’t have to risk putting him on the practice squad. I’m certain that if he’s not on the 53, he’s going to be poached (like Daniel originally was from the Redskins).
Hopefully after the debut by the new-look Chiefs I will be rubbing my tummy with a satisfied smile … and immediately pass out.
What type of Chiefs sandwich are you Addicts hoping to sink your teeth into this Friday?