The Evil That Is Al Davis

by Chiefs

This is Al Davis at a press conference a few years ago. Believe it or not, compared to how he looked yesterday, he looks fantastic here.

Here at Arrowhead Addict we don’t like Al Davis. He is the owner of the Oakland Raiders and we are fans of the Kansas City Chiefs. We hate the Raiders and thus we hate their owner. In fact, the only thing we like about Davis is that as he gets older he continues to maker poorer and poorer personnel decisions for his team, which he lords over sort of like Satan rules hell.

Well yesterday, Al went unplugged a few of his cyborg power cords and went on battery power to give a press conference to introduce yet another poor son of a bitch as the head coach of the Oakland Raiders.

What resulted was something of a horror show in which Davis, now 124 years of age, was bleeding from the head and the left eye, rambled on about the Raiders’ glory days while comparing Jason Campbell to everyone from Jim Plunkettto to Count Chocula.

We managed to dig up some pictures of the whole ordeal but I have to warn you, it isn’t pretty. I’m serious Addicts. If you are eating or have a weak stomach or heart or have children around, you might not want to click continue reading.

Dear God it's bleeding from the eyes!

Seriously Al? Did you consider maybe wearing a hat? Sunglasses? Mummifying yourself? I mean, man alive, Hollywood special effects experts are going to be using that picture as inspiration when they design the next zombie movie.

The man is 81 years old but he looks a hell of a lot older. Can you imagine working for the Raiders? You’re working late watching tape, you are on your way out at like 2 in the morning and you walk past Davis’ office? Can you imagine how frightened you might be if you thought he had gone home for the evening and you happened to glance over your shoulder and see him sitting in there behind his desk?

I’d poop my pants.

Hell, I almost pooped my pants looking at this picture.

Anyone else disturbed?

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[...] The Evil That Is Al Davis [...]

Well let see for the record how many times did the queef's beat the Raiders this year? I'm thinking the of a number and i think it 0 yea that right 0 sure Al hasnt made the worlds best choice's when it come to personal but you guys shop like you are at the second hand store for the patriots

I can see the next movie, Al as the leader of a zombie football team trying to force their will on the NFL in revenge for what they were not able to accomplish on the field.(you pick the ending lol) thats one creepy looking dude for sure

Doesn't Lord Voldemort have the same scar as Harry Potter?

K…..sooo…here we go…”Ode to Alzheimers AL” (please sing this to the melody of the Beverly Hillbillies’ theme song): Come ‘n listen to my story ’bout Alzheimers AL A shadow of himself, at the moon he would howl, And then one day, dreamin of days gone by Purple Drank appeared causing AL to sigh, JaDumbarse, that is, black gold, BamaBoy… Well, the first thing you know, AL’s 2 and 14 Nother seasons gone by, AL still has a dream, Told ole Lance Californy is a place you ought’nt be So Lance loaded up the truck and moved to Tennessee Hollywood..vertical attack, man-on-man, 1969….. So AL’s still thinkin its 1969, With a vertical attack everything’ll be fine And Big AL know alls he gotta do, grab a Plunkett incarnate name of Campbell boo… After 6 long quarters Campbells a slug, ALs frothin at the mouth while Cable pulls the plug, Overhead projectors burnin a hole, better turn AL out fore he has em all on the dole. Well, now it’s time to say goodbye to AL and all his kin, AL would like to thank you folks for kindly droppin’ in Insanity and alzheimers, superbowls and gin. You’re all invited back again to this locality To have a heapin’ helpin’ of AL’s hospitality Dementia, that is, set a spell, take your shoes off Y’all come back now, hear?

Alrighty.....here we go w/Alzheimer's AL and his stanky stuff......entitled, "Revolving Coaches" (Please sing to the melody of "Green Acres" TV show.) AL’s folly is for all to see, Oakland Raiders is the team for me, Coaches spreading out so far and wide, Keep hiring and firing, just give me those days gone by. Coach upon coach is what I’d rather do, Dementia and inconsistency is the cardinal rule, AL just adores paying coaches half the price, Dah-Ling I love you, but AL’s fantasy is not-so-nice. Vertical attack, 1969 Man to man, mighty fine, Revolving Coaches, aint so cool….. AL knows best, nobody’s fool…. You are AL’s life, Cable’s gone, now Jackson’s his wife, Oakland Raiders We Are There!

Al Davis just wants a head coach with bbbbbbrrrrrrraaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaiiinnns!

Seriously, it really does make me sick to look at him very long. It actually looks like he had brain surgery. Creepy, very, very creepy.

It's just WRONG letting him appear in public! Did they have to give that press conference an "R" rating before they aired it? WOW!

If it was anyone but Al Davis, I'd feel sorry for him.

With what you can see, I can only wonder what is under the band-aid. Undoubtedly the portal to hell!

I seriously thought that was a photoshopped picture of Freddy! That's insane(ly disturbing)!

Damn! He looks like he is dying quicker than I would like. I figured we had five to ten years before we had to deal with any possibility of the Raiders turning it around. Oh well...

Haha Wow The blood fromt he eye is creepy guess that what he gets from selling his sole to satan.

Well I guess you gave me a fair warning but this was too much! He looks like Freddy Krueger at 150! I guess it's not that far off, as he will be haunting my dreams tonight!

He does kind of look like Freddy.

watch Revenge of the Sith. He looks like Palpatine after he got hit with force lightning

Everytime I hear about Davis, I think about how cool the Hunts are.

You only think the Hunts are cool because you're from the most un-cool part of the country. Go Raiders............had fun beating you twice this year!

Well let see for the record how many times did the queef's beat the Raiders this year? I'm thinking the of a number and i think it 0 yea that right 0 sure Al hasnt made the worlds best choice's when it come to personal but you guys shop like you are at the second hand store for the patriots

I can see the next movie, Al as the leader of a zombie football team trying to force their will on the NFL in revenge for what they were not able to accomplish on the field.(you pick the ending lol) thats one creepy looking dude for sure

Doesn't Lord Voldemort have the same scar as Harry Potter?

K…..sooo…here we go…”Ode to Alzheimers AL” (please sing this to the melody of the Beverly Hillbillies’ theme song):

Come ‘n listen to my story ’bout Alzheimers AL
A shadow of himself, at the moon he would howl,
And then one day, dreamin of days gone by
Purple Drank appeared causing AL to sigh,

JaDumbarse, that is, black gold, BamaBoy…

Well, the first thing you know, AL’s 2 and 14
Nother seasons gone by, AL still has a dream,
Told ole Lance Californy is a place you ought’nt be
So Lance loaded up the truck and moved to Tennessee

Hollywood..vertical attack, man-on-man, 1969…..

So AL’s still thinkin its 1969,
With a vertical attack everything’ll be fine
And Big AL know alls he gotta do, grab a Plunkett incarnate name of Campbell boo…

After 6 long quarters Campbells a slug,
ALs frothin at the mouth while Cable pulls the plug,
Overhead projectors burnin a hole, better turn AL out fore he has em all on the dole.

Well, now it’s time to say goodbye to AL and all his kin,
AL would like to thank you folks for kindly droppin’ in

Insanity and alzheimers, superbowls and gin.

You’re all invited back again to this locality
To have a heapin’ helpin’ of AL’s hospitality
Dementia, that is, set a spell, take your shoes off

Y’all come back now, hear?

Alrighty.....here we go w/Alzheimer's AL and his stanky stuff......entitled, "Revolving Coaches" (Please sing to the melody of "Green Acres" TV show.)

AL’s folly is for all to see,
Oakland Raiders is the team for me,

Coaches spreading out so far and wide,
Keep hiring and firing, just give me those days gone by.

Coach upon coach is what I’d rather do,
Dementia and inconsistency is the cardinal rule,
AL just adores paying coaches half the price,
Dah-Ling I love you, but AL’s fantasy is not-so-nice.

Vertical attack, 1969
Man to man, mighty fine,
Revolving Coaches, aint so cool…..
AL knows best, nobody’s fool….

You are AL’s life,
Cable’s gone, now Jackson’s his wife,
Oakland Raiders We Are There!

Al Davis just wants a head coach with bbbbbbrrrrrrraaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaiiinnns!

Seriously, it really does make me sick to look at him very long. It actually looks like he had brain surgery. Creepy, very, very creepy.

It's just WRONG letting him appear in public! Did they have to give that press conference an "R" rating before they aired it? WOW!

If it was anyone but Al Davis, I'd feel sorry for him.

With what you can see, I can only wonder what is under the band-aid. Undoubtedly the portal to hell!

I seriously thought that was a photoshopped picture of Freddy! That's insane(ly disturbing)!

Damn! He looks like he is dying quicker than I would like. I figured we had five to ten years before we had to deal with any possibility of the Raiders turning it around. Oh well...

Haha Wow The blood fromt he eye is creepy guess that what he gets from selling his sole to satan.

Well I guess you gave me a fair warning but this was too much! He looks like Freddy Krueger at 150! I guess it's not that far off, as he will be haunting my dreams tonight!

He does kind of look like Freddy.

watch Revenge of the Sith. He looks like Palpatine after he got hit with force lightning

Everytime I hear about Davis, I think about how cool the Hunts are.

You only think the Hunts are cool because you're from the most un-cool part of the country. Go Raiders............had fun beating you twice this year!