Five Things: The Hated Raidahs

Five Things That Scare Me About the Raiders:

1. Ronald Curry. He always roasts us.

2. Tommy Kelly. Warren Sapp says he still doesn’t know how to play defensive tackle. With his size and talent, if he figures out a little more this week…let’s just say Adrian Jones and Rudy Niswanger could be in trouble.

3. Darren McFadden. Run DMC is a lot harder to tackle than Sammy Morris. Our linebackers better step up.

4. Al Davis. He looks like something out of George A. Romero horror film.

5. Nnamdi Asomugha. Possibly the most underrated player in the NFL.

Five Things That Don’t Scare Me About the Raiders:

1. That they got blown out at home by the Broncos. Yikes!

2. Their fans dress-up obsession. We know this is just how they overcompensate for having to share showers with other men while incarcerated.

3. Javon Walker. He’s a bigger threat to himself than he is to our defense.

4. Lane Kiffin. He’s already a lame duck. Book it.

5. DeAngelo Hall Fall. I used to like Hall. But for what he’s getting paid, shouldn’t he be able to stick with Eddie Royal? Warren Sapp is right, “over-rated…duh, duh, duh, duh, duh!”

Addicts, what does or doesn’t scare you about Sunday’s match-up?

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