George Watch: Whitlock’s Totally Lost It
This was one of our first features here at Arrowhead Addict, and it’s back. We monitored Jason Whitlock trying to coax the Chiefs into signing his old buddy Jeff George. We thought Jay was absolutely out of his frackin’ mind back then, so you can imagine what we think now. Yes, Jason Witless (he’s back on the sh** list) has written another letter to his football soulmate Bill Belichick, this time urging him to sign the 40-year-old George. He’s not joking either. Not at all.
At this rate, Whitlock will still be trying to get George an NFL quarterbacking gig when I’m 40 (a little over a decade). Give it up, “Big Sexy.” Your boy is a bust, and you were wrong (that’s the bigger issue to you anyway). Coulda, shoulda, woulda–didn’t. Let George move on with his new life, where he’s the spokesperson for the National Mullet Association.
I can’t believe I actually stuck up for you a little while ago. This is how you repay me? Thanks a lot. Now I’m going to have to enter the Whitlock Protection Program and hand over A.A. to the rest of the staff. Just great. Your George mancrush just turned me into the sportsblogging version of Henry Hill.
From the Kansas City Star (I can’t believe they let him even print this garbage):
Coach Belichick, I know the game. It’s a gift from the football gods.
I warned you that if you played Brady against the Chiefs, he might suffer an injury to his leg or knee. I told you that Matt Cassel was good enough to beat the Chiefs.
Look, I’m not writing you this follow-up letter to gloat. I like you. I’m a big fan. I’m trying to hand you the advantage I’ve tried to give to Carl Peterson and the Chiefs for years.
You need Jeff George.
Don’t laugh. Pick the newspaper back up. Keep reading. You didn’t listen to me last week, and what happened?
You need Jeff George. Yes, that Jeff George, the No. 1 pick in the 1990 draft, the guy who tongue-lashed June Jones in Atlanta, had one great season in Oakland and Minnesota before falling victim to Marty Schottenheimer’s wrath in Washington.
Yes, I know Jeff George hasn’t thrown a pass in an actual NFL game since 2001 and hasn’t been on a roster since Lovie Smith and the Bears let him go at the end of the 2005 season.
You do realize that Todd Collins went six years without starting an NFL game before leading Washington to three victories last season? You realize Todd Collins was never as good as Jeff George?
You realize even at age 40 and having lived in football exile for three years, Jeff George still has one of the five best arms in the game? Oh, he can still wing it with the best of them. He’s in great shape. He’s ready to go right now.
Bill, I’m not crazy. Yes, I’m in the tank for Jeff George. We grew up together on the east side of Indianapolis, and we take loyalty very, very seriously.
He’s not perfect. He mishandled his career and talent. But the dude is 40 now and still wants to play. He can get the ball to Randy Moss and stretch a defense.
It’s time to euthanize this fool, at least professionally. We all get attached to guys (like yours truly and Bobby Sippio), but this has become a personal salvation project. No Chiefs fan or Kansas Citian wants to read about your over-the-hill sugar pie signal caller. Then again, maybe if you do coax a team to sign him you’ll end up leaving town to cover your boy? Hmmm…
Whatever happens, you may haved dubbed Carl Peterson “King Carl,” but I’m giving you a new moniker–Jason the Jester. Hey, every royal court needs one. For you, I bet we can even get that tightwad to splurge on your new clown costume. 4XL, right?
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If Brad Childress is smart enough to avoid Jeff George, certainly Bill Belichick is.
September 11th, 2008 at 7:21 amJason tha Jester? That is HORRIBLE! Now I have to change my name!
September 11th, 2008 at 8:25 amWe all know why Whitless love George there are two of the same.
Overweight underachievers, that spout off at the mouth. George couldn’t read defenses, and Whitlock just can’t read.
September 11th, 2008 at 10:04 amI’m so sorry, Jester. I would have gone with Joker, but I’m a die-hard Batman fan and Jester went better with King Carl Had to…
September 11th, 2008 at 12:15 pmWhitlock…. (sigh…) I don’t even know what to say. In my weekly Chiefs podcast I think Whitlock, aka Jason the Jester, just put his name in as a “tool of the week” nominee.
http://www.kcchiefsfootball.com
Go Chiefs!
September 11th, 2008 at 2:20 pmOnly is Jabba’s diseased mind is he a soulmate of any NFL GM. Wait, on second thought, he is a soulmate of an NFL GM, Matt Millin.
September 11th, 2008 at 5:47 pmThere’s no way he was serious.
September 11th, 2008 at 5:51 pm