The top ten reasons why the Chiefs are cooler than the Cardinals:
9. Ken Whisenhunt is the Wiz of Odds…long odds. The Cardinals are never going to make the playoffs again. EVER.
8. Speaking of playoffs, how many freakin’ years in a row will the Cards be everybody’s sleeper team? Give it up already.
7. Brenda Warner (she was scary enough before I knew she was a Marine–yikes!) can beat her hubby Kurt Warner in arm wrestling. Not in sacking groceries, though.
6. Dennis Green once screamed “they are who we thought they were” as Cardinals coach. Well, the Cards are who we think they are–losers! And they always will be.
5. Nice pass coverage last week, Cards. You guys made draft bust Robert Meachem look like Randy Moss.
4. Has anybody told Calais Campbell that he has a chick’s name? Someone, please, help a brother out.
3. Every time I think about Junior Siavii or Ryan Simms, I just think about how we could have drafted Alan Branch, too, and the pain goes away.
2. Even if Edgerrin James and Larry Johnson are both washed up (and L.J. is definitely not), at least L.J. can read. Have you ever heard Edge speak? He makes Shawn Kemp look like Barack Obama.
1. The Cardinals couldn’t hack it in the Show-Me State.