The Landry Crap And Its Epic Homerism
As some of you might know, we have a sister site called The Landry Hat, which represents America’s Team America’s least favorite team, the Dallas Cowboys. Dan T., the lead writer over there, sure knows his stuff when it comes to the Cowboys. When it comes to the rest of the league, however, he apparently doesn’t know jack.
First off, he criticized this thread and its comments, where myself, Zach and many readers rank Larry Johnson as a top-five NFL running back. Maybe it’s just me, but when a guy starts off as hot as any back in NFL history and was second in rushing the season before last, yeah, that guy is one of the five best in the league. Hell, three years ago he would have made it to the coveted 2,000-yard mark if he hadn’t been buried behind Priest Holmes for half the year.
Look, we know Marion Barber is a very good player, and also that you hate the Chiefs, but let’s be honest here. In a season where K.C.’s Iron Man only got three starts and was Priest’s towel boy for most of the year, he racked up almost 600 yards and nine rushing touchdowns. In Barber’s career year, last year, he totaled a little shy of 1,000 yards and had 10 rushing TDs. C’mon, Dan, in what was basically a season and a half L.J. racked up over 3,500 rushing yards and 37 rushing TDs. You’re telling me a guy who has yet to record 1,000 yards rushing or more than 14 rushing TDs in a season is better than that? Next to L.J., Marion Barber looks like Maid Marian.
Wake up, baby! Maybe Jerry Jones should hook you up with some of that Pepsi with ginseng in it.
After the jump it even gets worse…
Now TLH is claiming that Jason Witten is better than Tony Gonzalez in his comments, which he promises to follow up with a post. Buddy. last time I checked, Tony G had caught more TDs than any tight end to ever lace up his cleats. That’s a fact. I mean, there is even less of a case here than in the Barber-Johnson debate. Comparing Witten to Gonzalez would be like comparing Terrell Owens to Jerry Rice. Witten is a great player, but we’re talking about the greatest player to ever play the position here. His stats are better than even Shannon Sharpe’s, and he’s still going strong.
Still don’t believe me? Fine. You’ve made me trump you in front of God and football country. Tony Gonzalez has had more catches and yards than Witten in all five of Witten’s seasons. YOU…HAVE…NO…EFFING…CASE!
All of this isn’t surprising, as this is the kind of rampant homerism and delusional thinking we’ve all come to expect from fans of the Cowgirls. I mean, I love the Chiefs, but I’m not going to sit here and say Brandon Flowers is better than Terrence Newman. I’m not going to say calling Tony Romo a top-five quarterback is “plain retarded.” I guess some bloggers can bring objectivity, and some can’t. Especially the two-bit shock jocks that are blogging about the ‘Boys these days.
We got love for you, Dan, but when you talk smack on the Chiefs and Arrowhead Addict you better bring it, because we always will. Good luck and good night.
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OMG LOL DAN JUST GOT PWNED! LMAO
look at that picture lol
June 8th, 2008 at 7:19 pmYeah, he’s not going to be happy. You know what they say, though. Eff with the Chiefs, get an arrow up your arse. His retribution may be swift, but we thoroughly enjoyed getting in the first shot!
June 8th, 2008 at 7:37 pmmmmmm the old texas phrase comes to mind when I think of Landry Hat… All hat, no cattle
June 8th, 2008 at 7:47 pmI had no idea Cowboy fans hated us. Who else, outside our division, hates us?
June 8th, 2008 at 8:04 pmI think Cowboys fans just hate us because they know we are truer fans. If it weren’t for fans like Chiefs, Browns and Eagles fans, Cowgirls fans might actually be pretty close to the best. Instead, they have to act like Steelers and Raiders fans and make believe.
June 8th, 2008 at 8:07 pmdamnit..lol…i posted under the best running back one and i shoulda posted it here…lol
June 8th, 2008 at 8:23 pmMy lawyer will be contacting you this week about the illegal use of the photograph which is under copyright protection.
My action will be more swift than you can imagine
June 8th, 2008 at 8:47 pmYou know how to get a hold of us. Wouldn’t be the first time we’ve dealt with lawyers and copyrights. We’re vets after the Stripe Hype fiasco!
June 8th, 2008 at 8:55 pmAh Adam… as you may not have noticed yet… there are only two things bigger than Texas in Texas… and one of them is the presumption any fart from a Texan is more authoritive about football than any other human being on the face of the planet - and the other has something to do with inbreeding as the root cause of planetary egos… but we wont go there.
The Cowboys are actually a solid team these days ON the football field, unfortunately, this creates the hazardous and often laughbable conditions among their fans which produces the literal fungal lunacy found in the foam around the mouths of guys like Dan T.
I dont think it’s actually their fault this occurs, rather it’s mostly a by-product of eating stringy grass-fed beef and second rate barbeque… not to mention the copious consumption of that noxious ‘beer’ they call ‘Lone Star’. Were they actually afforded the opportunity to tailgate with REAL bbq… they might actually develope a taste for Boulevard Ale as well as the ability to appreciate football played north of the Red River.
June 8th, 2008 at 8:59 pmMan, this beating is almost as bad as the one the C’s are putting on the Lakers. Keep puttin’ it to him, boys!
June 8th, 2008 at 9:29 pm@ thelandryhat:
The picture used here falls under the parody rights, and for all intents and purposes, is a completely original artwork. You have no legal ground in the real or electronic world.
June 8th, 2008 at 9:39 pmThe Que*rboys are currently number four on my list of most hated NFL teams, Behind the Donkeys, Chargers, and Raiders for obvious reasons. A couple thoughts…
1. I hate them so much that I hope Tony Blomo gets an STD from Jessica Simpson(then TO cries about it on ESPN), and Adam “I am packin” Jones loses an eye in a freak stripper related incident.
2. Jason Witten sucks, but lets say for the sake of argument that all statistical categories for him and Gonzalez were equal…Tony G. does not have a speech impediment…therefore Tony G. wins!
3. Does anyone think Tony Blomo had that stupid smile on his face after botching the fieldgoal snap?
4. It is Marion “I need to see a” Barber.
5. Roy Williams could not cover a dead dog located in the middle of the wierd shape in the middle of their field.
6. Thank god Lamar Hunt (the greatest owner in history) brought the better team to Kansas City.
More Later…Go Chiefs!
June 8th, 2008 at 10:11 pmGreat article. I love the pic! You’re right too. His rating Marion Barber top 5 is a purely homer move. I’m not sure I’d rate LJ top 5 either (at least until he proves he can stay healthy), but you won’t find me arguing with you about Landry.
There’s also no question that Gonzo is one of the best tight ends ever, if not the best. Witten has a long way to go before he can come close to that.
June 8th, 2008 at 11:12 pm[...] Kansas City Chiefs fans have upped the ante in their attack on The Landry Hat just because I used sound judgment in my [...]
June 8th, 2008 at 11:14 pmJust look at the facts Adam…It’s not a stretch to say Jason Witten is currently the best tight end in the NFL. Their stats in their first five years are almost IDENTICAL!
June 8th, 2008 at 11:19 pmumm… i can name 2 tight ends in the NFL better than Jason Witten…Antonio Gates, and Tony Gonzalez. Witten will not ever come close to what Gonzalez has been. Tony has done it and stayed consistent with many different QB’s now. he was great with Elvis Grbac-up ….Trent Green, and Damon Huard, and now even Brodie Croyle….well considering only 1 of these QB’s was actually worth a damn, Tony G did the best with some of the worst. Witten cant hold a flame to the greatest tight end of all time, Tony Gonzalez….(Shannon Sharpe had Elway)
June 8th, 2008 at 11:33 pmYou can say that Witten is on track to be as good as Tony, but when Tony’s stats have been better head-to-head for all of Witten’s career you simply cannot say that he is currently better. Makes zero sense.
Guy, as for Larry, he has had one injury and that is it. Otherwise he has been a warrior and one of the top-five rushers in the league week in, week out. Easy. Appreciate your view on Tony. He doesn’t get enough love. Meanwhile, TLH gets too much love–from himself!
June 8th, 2008 at 11:35 pm[...] The Landry Crap And Its Epic Homerism [...]
June 9th, 2008 at 12:25 amI got mad respect for Marion Barber- but face the facts ‘Boys fans.. You have one of the top 5 O-lines in the NFL; currently. If you did in fact have ‘the best TE in the NFL’ that only adds to the excellency of your O-line. Mix in that you had 2 pro-bowl running backs, as well as a perrennial all-pro WR, and ‘A great QB in Tony Homo,’ and Marion still can’t rush for 1,000 yards? Someone tell me what the problem is here.. And don’t tell me it was Julius’s fault. Either Marion isn’t as good as you think he is… Or the others aren’t as good as you think they are.
Witten is on pace to put up similar numbers as Tony G. he’s also working with, as I said, a pro bowl receiver, a pro bowl QB, ‘top notch’ talent all around him, and he still can’t beat Gonzo’s numbers? When Tony G. is almost gauranteed to be double covered, especially in the red zone? T.O. draws the double coverage for your team, buddy. Witten should be surpassing his numbers by far, if indeed he was that good. Yet he’s not. Even though Tony’s got a worse supporting cast.. Your logic is astonishing.
IF Witten can prove he’s a number 1 receiving option, or if Marion the Barbarian ever rushes for at least 1750 yards in a season, or… if they make the pro-bowl AND win a playoff game in the same year (something that hasn’t happened in exactly HOW long, buddy?) then I’ll give them their due. Sadly, they’re still just younger versions of the already proven stars of LJ and TG. Sure, they’re talented.. But please, wait until they produce year in and year out.
Please- go find another team to beef on.. I’m begging you. Our fans are far different from the wagon-jumping ‘Boys fans, I’ll tell you that much right now. You can’t handle this. So..
Ya’ll don’t come back now, ya’ hear?
June 9th, 2008 at 1:51 amThat was cute, the whole “Y’all don’e come back now, ya’ hear?”
I’m not a wagon jumper. Like Dan, I’m a Cowboys fan in northern VA, so I’m behind enemy lines here and have to prove that I’m a real fan regularly. I’ve been a fan since I was four or five years old, no matter how bad the ‘boys sucked.
First off, your argument against Marion Barber is tremeandously flawed. Barber only touched the ball 204 times last year. If he touched the ball 300-400 times like LJ did when he broke 1700 yards, I bet you’d see similar production. So, not only were the pro-bowl wide receiver, tight end, and quarterback taking away attention from Barber, they were also taking away rushing attempts. I’m sorry that our offense isn’t so feeble that we have to rely on one or two targets.
You also fail to realize that our pro-bowl WR might be stealing away from Witten’s numbers, too. 81 grabs for 1300 yards and 15 touchdowns: he might’ve been double covered, but he’s still open, guy.
The thing is that we don’t need Witten to be our #1 receiving option. Any team that looks to their tight end as their #1 receiving option should be braced for failure. We also don’t need for Marion to rush for 1750 yards. Why should we when we have a pro-bowl quarterback, a pro-bowl TE and a pro-bowl WR? You say that they all draw attention away from Witten and MBIII, but they also draw away alot of the touches that they would get if they were in an insignificant, impotent offense.
And just out of curiousity when’s the last time you all won a playoff game, BUDDY? Oh, that’s right, it was 1993, when we won the Super Bowl.
It appears as though I’ve just handled this, so y’all come on back whenever you like, I’ll make you look stupid all over again.
June 9th, 2008 at 9:06 amMBIIIeffect in da house!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
June 9th, 2008 at 9:16 amMarion Barber didn’t get the touches because he was backing up Julius Jones, end of conversation.
Witten and Gonzalez isn’t even an argument until Witten can continue his success. Speculating is for fortune tellers. “To be the man, you gotta be the man.”
On winning playoff games, your right we have sucked in that department, but in the 2000’s I believe we have the same amount of wins in the playoffs. That is the only point you win in this argument because of the glorious 90’s. I will give you that, but you won’t win the first two arguments with me.
You could give me every reason in the book, but until they do what LJ and Tony has done you won’t win that one.
Thanks for the comments. We love you guys…
June 9th, 2008 at 9:22 amJulius Jones was in the last year of his contract, they had him start because he needed to prove himself worthy of an extension. Thats why Barber Backed up
June 9th, 2008 at 10:34 amYes, I am sure thats why most players get the starting nod over other players. TDCowboys that is an horrid excuse.
What is your excuse for the Cowboys using a first round pick on Felix Jones? Because Marion is so great they needed to use a 1st round pick on a RB, LMAO!
June 9th, 2008 at 10:38 amAddicts go vote for Tony:
http://fansided.com/forums/viewtopic.php?f=75&t=470&start=0
June 9th, 2008 at 10:45 amMake us look stupid, eh? I do applaud TLH using someone with at least an 8th grade education to do his dirty work.. It seems he would be rather disappointing to talk to. The only things he’s capable of are copy and pasting words from the post/comments, or saying “MBIIIeffect in da house!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” .. After saying seanbcool’s name is rather gay, when everyone has their own reasons for their name, and also calling out Zach for saying LOL, I find it funny he has said “MBIIIeffect in da house!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” multiple times on both sites. Not bothering to reiterate the whole ‘two things come from Texas:’ line, I’ll let your mind do the work; if it is indeed able. But back to the football talk.
Firstly- Marion was a backup running back. There’s a reason for that, and we can argue about that until the cows come home, quite literally, in your case… But the fact remains, he was a BACK UP. No… of course it’s not because Julius was a former PRO BOWLER, that has NOTHING to do with it! It’s because of some other happenstance, eh? Sorry kid, wrong. I will even take your arguement that it was JJ’s contract year so they were trying to see if he was still a nice back, or if he was going to be traded… If he had ‘beasted’, would the cowboys not have resigned him? Yes, they would have. Yes, he would have still been a starter, and yes, Marion would still be a backup. Point. Set. Match.
Secondly- Our team should be braced for failure? Our offense has only been stagnant for a year.. The year before, we were ranked 16th overall, which; while not good, isn’t horrible either. And the previous 5 years before that, we were in the top 3 in offense every year. Tony was consistently the number one target in all those offenses. To say that a TE #1 receiver is bogus is plain retarded. See: Ravens, no good wide receivers (outside of old Derrick) and Todd Heap is a young, very nice TE. Would you argue that he wasn’t the number 1 receiving option last year? What about Bubba Franks for a few years in Green Bay, when their WR’s were mediocre, not the studs they have now, or had in the past? Or tell me about Owen Daniels, who stepped up when Andre Johnson went down. Or tell me how come the Titan’s got Alge when there WR corps is … well.. shitty. TE’s are a major part of the game; especially the best ones, ie, TONY GONZALEZ.
Thirdly- no, I did not fail; as you claim, to see the logic in him losing touches by having a better supporting cast. I’m saying, since you’ve got a ’super-star *choking specialist-especially late in the season* quarterback’, 3 legitimate receiving threats, as well as an all around ‘beast’ TE, the defense should be playing the pass all game long. Marion couldn’t break 1K yards when the defense was definetly scared of the pass the whole game, every game? Also, what you fail to realize, oh ye of little mental intelligence… Larry Johnson while yes, having twice the carries your beloved MBIII had, still had twice the yards, while facing 8-9 men in the box nearly every rush. How many times, with your super-potent passing offense, has MBIII, or JJ, for that matter, faced 9 men in the box? Not very often, not nearly as often as LJ. Try to belittle me as much as you’d like, but the facts point at LJ being a beast, while MBIII needs to come out this year and have a huge year. He may not even be your starter by the end of the year. That’s up to Felix.
Fourthly- The hypocritical nature of TLH is quite astonishing.. Coming onto our site- throwing out backhanded comments and thinly veiled insults, and then, when retaliated against, coming back on our site to tell us that cheap shots aren’t welcome on his site? I thought Jason Whitlock wore the name ‘the Witless’ fairly well, but I think there’s no question, TLH deserves that honor.
June 9th, 2008 at 12:02 pmSeriously!! MB3 missed rushing for 1000yds by 25 yards as a backup on 204 carries. 25yds thats like me telling you Bowe isnt good becasue he didnt have 1000 yards reciveing which he missed by 5 yds.
June 9th, 2008 at 12:37 pmCan’t you just hear the starved quality of whine in Thelaundrymat’s voice… this is another sad effect from eating too much second class BBQ. The man simply needs a beef and a half from AB’s - and a long neck.
June 9th, 2008 at 7:32 pmWrong, wrong, wrong. How many times do I have to tell you, xxxlp, you really don’t know what you’re talking about at all. I’m going to make this quick.
1. 2007 rushing attempts
Marion Barber III: 204 carries
Julius Jones: 184 carries
In how many systems does a backup carry the ball more often than the primary back? None, stupid. Jones is in for the first play, which makes him the starter, but he isn’t the feature back in our offense. You or anyone else that thinks otherwise because Barber isn’t in for the first offensive play of the game should be institutionalized.
2. All those teams you mentioned with good TE’s and no receivers all had shitty offenses last year, too. Baltimore: 22nd in total offense last year. TE’s are a major part of the offense, but when they’re the only dangerous receiver on the field, you should be concerned.
3. We have 3 legitimate receiving threats, a pro-bowl quarterback, and a line that’s built for pass blocking: belive it or not, we’re going to throw it first. I’m going to look at average yards per carry to see which RB is better so I can see which is better when he gets his number called.
Last year:
LJ: 3.5 yards per carry
MBIII: 4.8 yards per carry
4. What’s the deal with your damn BBQ? That and the Chiefs must be the only two things y’all have to talk about in Kansas, huh? I like the North Carolina BBQ personally.
June 10th, 2008 at 12:17 amOnly a Texan would say “Damn BBQ” - as in “Damn I gotta eat that $hit AGAIN??” Once you KNOW what real BBQ is, you will be more qualified to make arguments about other serious things; like running backs. In the meantime, do not expect real fans to take your arguments seriously. I mean, how can we even entertain your point of view if you have never really tailgated properly? You have NO IDEA what a real fan is yet - as your question about BBQ so plainly demonstrates.
June 10th, 2008 at 2:33 amI love how stupid Texans think the Kansas City Chiefs are in Kansas.
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