Crane Damage: Iron Eyes

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The ~~Chiefs~~ Cheaps are letting us down time and time again. We need a change that speaks to the displeasure of 80% of Cheaps fans. We need something dramatic, that tugs at the heartstrings of children and adults alike…and strikes a chord so loud that it is heard from Springfield to Denver…from Wisconsin to North Texas and beyond.

I thought to myself .oO (What can we do as a show of frustrated solidarity to tell the Cheaps that they are breaking our collective spirit???)

We need to change our mascot from the moronic KC Wolf, which has nothing to do with the “Chiefs,” to Iron Eyes Cody…

…the crying Indian from the Keep America Beautiful public service announcement in the early 1970s. It was an ecology commercial where an Indian (Cody) sheds a tear after some trash is thrown from a car and lands by his feet. The announcer states “People start pollution; people can stop it.” Maybe it could be…”Fans made the Chiefs; fans can change the Chiefs.”

Cody was actually an Italian-American…but adopted several Native American children and denounced his Italian heritage. So, much like the Cheaps, Iron Eyes was a “fake-ass” Indian…like the Cheaps are a “fake-ass” football team. What could be more appropriate?

For old time’s sake…here is the YouTube video of the original commercial. We feel ya Iron Eyes…we feel ya. *sniffle*

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jay

No response from best bros...

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stevenh

Crane, if you believe it, speak man...but please don't call KC Wolf "moronic" I love that fuzzy guy!

Scott

HA!!! "Crane you ignorant slut". That is classic.

Adam, that's a fantastic idea. Dueling columns would be a great read during the slow offseason (especially for us Chiefs fans).

Best Bros, can I have a feature on the site titled "Crane you ignorant slut?" (I'm sure most know this is from an SNL Chevy Chase, Jane Curtain news debate where Chevy would begin every counterpoint with Jane you ignorant slut, hilarious!) Crane, obviously you and I disagree on just about everything, which is healthy. Why not have the other side on the site. I'm not a homer, but I certainly think its no time to panic.

jason

Thats ok i can take a kickin and keep on tickin

Crane

-Tim-

Cute? Why don't you put on your big girl dress and prance around for us? Nothing is ever addressed as cute, check your man-manual if you can still read it from correcting the mistakes.

Jason I love it, just don't get mad when I kick back.

just kidding figured i'd kick a man while he was down i really kinda like the guy

give crane some time and he'll be just like everyone else (wrong )

Adam

Has our intern finally rejoined us?

Tim

Your title? No one gives a crap about your "title." So far "Crane Damage" is uninspiring, boring and offers little entertainment value.

Put a little effort into it. The name is cute, but that's about it.

Crane Damage

And Chiefs too...man, I'm slippin Tim.

Sorry about the "doesn't" Tim.

Wow, I guess everyone is a critic. I appreciate you stepping in Adam, but this is all sticks and stones. As for ilamuku, Cody was Italian, but after everyone considered him an Indian because he played the part...it eventually became part of his identity. Any of you guys out there that seem to have something against me just because I'm negative or whatever, need to relax a bit yourselves. This Cheifs blog dowsn't have to and won't match your opinion 100% of the time. If you get 4-5 posts in a row about how I feel about certain things, its because we attract new readers and they might not know what you know. This is not a running dialogue...nor are the comments the place for a thesis paper on why you disagree. If you want my title, come and get it, but don't scream in your driveway shaking your fist at me like an old man.

Yawn. So far "Crane Damage," is pretty boring.

ilamuku

Dude looks Italian. Great analogy!

Wow, the reaction to this one was like the King Carl fan club. Bob Gretz couldn't have done any better :)

mike

So to make a long story boring, Carl? Herm? Don't go there again.

Just to give you an idea of my advanced state of football dementia, I can recall sitting in the stands for the Cheebs of the late 70's and early 80's. We're talking Kevin Harlin or Kevin Wall as the announcers. Warren McVey and Herman Heard running the ball behind the likes of Tom Condon or Ken Kremer or Jack Rudnay. Art Still, Mike Bell, Gary Spani, Gary Barbaro, Gary Green, or the Man, Deron Cherry on D. Who could forget Henry Marshall, Carlos Carson, Stephon Paige, or Jayice Pearson? Well, besides me? The Cheebs fielded some teams back then that no amount of stadium beer could make better. And I swear upon Joe Delaney's cleats that they had the unmitigated gall to feature Stroh's beer at the vending stands! That, my dear readers was a bag over the head punch in the gut. I seem to recall that after two or eight, they started to have an after taste that would leave your tounge feeling as if it were wearing an unmatched pair of argyle socks...

Crane, if that's what you think, then go blog for a "real-ass" team.

My spirit isn't broken. Yours shouldn't be either.

Chiefs fans have been screaming for change for years now. This IS change.

Next season might be a bit rocky, but I guarantee you that if the current trend continues the CHIEFS will have more success in the next 5 years than they've had in the last 20.

Lighten up, buddy. It'll be ok.

I can assure you that Crane is not one of those. He's just a very vocal, opinionated guy. I've also seen Crane do some pretty good stand-up comedy, so keep that in mind. He's kind of our Kenny Mayne, I suppose.

merlinnj

Adam: My point is that if someone feels that we are a 'fake ass team" perhaps one of the other teams will be more to his liking. There are plenty of fans that only root for a team that is going well. Always room for one more on a bandwagon.

Merlin, lots of us are unhappy with the Chiefs. That doesn't mean we aren't good fans. When did being a fan mean that you had to be an apologist for your team, enabling poor performance?

Additionally, Zach and I like for all Chiefs fans to be represented here. With polar opposite voices, such as Crane and Steven, we feel we do that. And having all these different opinions sparks great discussion.

Crane: Since you seem very unhappy, perhaps you should become a fan of a team that spends money. How about the J E T S jets, jets, jets. Then, in 2 years when you are shelling out huge money for a barely functional alan faneca, we can talk about how to build a team right.