10 Reasons Why the Lions are More Pathetic Than We are:
10. 10 wins? 50 TDs? Jon Kitna isn’t exactly Nostradamus, is he?
9. Our coach may be goofy, too, but at least his name doesn’t sound like pasta sauce.
7. I thought our secondary was prone to getting burned. Damn. Even washed-up Donovan McNabb looked like a pro bowler against the Lions this season. (and even in those god awful dandelion and baby blue unis)
6. Kevin Jones isn’t exactly Barry Sanders, is he. His back up, T.J. Duckett, actually looks like he’s spent more time trying to be like Sanders. Colonel Sanders, that is.
5. No matter how bad Dick Curl and Mike Prifer have been, at least they don’t drive through fast food joints butt-ass naked.
4. Charles Rogers. Mike Williams. Man, I thought we were bad at this draft thing.
3. As much as Chiefs fans loathe King Carl right now, not one of them would trade him for Mat Millen.
2. Shaun Rogers looks like the black Stay Puft Marshmallow Man.
1. God’s Team? More like Fraud Team. Might want to make sure that relationship is reciprocal next time, Kitna. I think the Big Fella is actually more fond of guys like Peyton and Tom than you and Kurt.