Samie Parker is… "Uno Ocho"

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You know what, Samie Parker has got me thinking.

Why is it that only the star wide receivers get the great nicknames? Why is it that only the star receivers get to do their elaborate touchdown celebrations?

Maybe Marvin Harrison‘s got it right. I think all the star receivers should just hand the ball off to the refs Barry Sanders style and get back to the game, and all the so-marginally-talented-that-most-people-are-shocked-they-still-have-a-roster-spot receivers should act the fool. Now that makes sense!

Why is Chad Johnson so special anyway? If he gets to be Ocho Cinco, Parker should now be known as “Uno Ocho.” I mean, who else…

Points up to God in the sky like Jerry Rice after he just broke the all-time record after making a seven-yard snag, even a nice one? His only catch of the day, I might add.
Celebrates routine first down hauls like they were The Immaculate Reception? OK, besides Freddie Mitchell?
Acts like he won Powerball when he actually does catch a touchdown? I’d be remiss if I didn’t add here that it seems like all of Parker’s touchdown catches seem to come during garbage time.

I’m serious, why not let the future journeyman receiver go Kanye West every time he makes a catch? Also-rans have egos, too, right? Who knows, that catch could be his last. No, I’m not counting the CFL.

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Adam

Marcia, Marcia, Marcia... love your support of the site, but not your support of Uno Ocho. D-Bo has already crushed the four-year vet's best season with four games left to play in his rookie season. There's no comparison there. As far as opportunities go, Samie has started for the majority of the past four years, at least as the slot guy. He's had his chance and then some.

I also think if the light ever does go on, it will be with some pass-happy team like Detroit or Arizona.

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Marcia

As a born and raised Chief's fan, I feel that Samie has not been given the chance he deserves. On a year to year basis, this year Samie has faired better than unhurt #87. In his natural position of slot reciever, Samie has caught many crucial drive continuing throws; even though he has been thrown few passes during regulation. In the current offensive system,(if you an can call it that) Samie has made crucial passes. I will agree that Dwayne Bowe is a good reciever, but where is the ridicule when he drops several opportune passes. Remembering back to last years playoff game against the Colts, EVERYONE dropped passes(TG included) and uno ocho was never given a chance. Long live UNO OCHO!

Can't agree with you here, Jon. A slot receiver who can't catch a quick slant is about as useful as an asshole on my elbow. Az-Hakim wasn't as fast as Samie is, but he had great, GREAT hands. He was like a much more athletic Chris Horn. No chance Samie is ever as good as Az. I've had four years to make that assessment.

Jon

I don't understand why Samie Parker is the scapegoat in Kansas City. I really don't. Nevermind that Kennison has dropped passes in far more crucial situations (playoffs anyone?) Nevermind that Jeff Webb has been far more of a a klutz trying to catch a ball. I actually like Samie Parker and feel that he has been miscast his entire career. He is not a #2 receiver, but I think he can be better than Az-hakim as a slot receiver. He would be great against looser coverages and if the offensive line and playcalling would actually give him opportunities to go deep. It seems like the only routes he ever runs are possession routes. So let's cut the guy a break. He's never going to be a 1,000 yard receiver, but it's not farfetched at all to believe he'll be a 500-yard slot receiver, and that's excellent.

thelandryhat

It did fly over my head. I didn't sense the sarcasm until the middle. However, I think it is prime time for you to call for Herm's head. He's taking the famed Chiefs nowhere fast....but will you do it?

It did fly over me. I didn't sense the sarcasm. Damn. Am I getting too serious? Crap. I sensed the sarcasm in the rest of the post, but I actually thought you thought Sammie is a star and then went on to slam said star because the Chiefs are rotten. Finally, I think you need to call for Herm's firing, if you haven't already. He's taking this team nowhere, if not backwards. But stay clear of Jason Garrett, and I mean it. He's not interested.

Wow, TLH, this one completely flew over your head. It was totally sarcastic and I was calling Samie the exact opposite of a star. I know you Texans are serious folk, but do they not have sarcasm yet down there in Texas?